Downloaded from YTS.MX
(upbeat music)
Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX
- Yo Jerz, why you keep trying to get at shorty?
You know her girl dick probably bigger than yours.
- That might be true, but I promise you,
ain't no bitch gonna stroke her shit better than me.
See I like girls that like girls,
'cause I'm a freaky-ass dude and I like freaky shit.
- See that's why you don't get no pussy, now,
'cause women see you do shit like that,
and besides, I done seen her turn down so many dudes.
Dudes with money.
So what's your broke ass gonna do different?
Put her treadmill together?
- Imma fuck the dog shit outta her
until she falls into a euphoric coma.
If a man doesn't have any real goals to accomplish,
what's the sense for that man to live?
- Are you serious, nigga?
Making a lesbian like dick is a real goal?
Man, I'd rather just fuck with the bisexual girls
who going to fuck me and her friend anyways
with no strings attached.
What the fuck is wrong with you?
* Do you think about me when you in the mood
* And unsatisfied
* Seen you smashing right
* Do you think about me when you realize that a good
* Yo, two in one
* To the sexy body girl
* To the big body girl
* And the fatty fatty girl
* (indistinct)
* Nine months of stress
* Can't catch my breath
* Must call a doctor please
* And save my chest
* She pierced my heart
* Gun shot through the chest
* Which way to go
* North, south, east, west
* Nowhere to run
* Nowhere to hide
* Stabbed two bad men
* Tried to take my pride
* Don't show no feelings
* Keep them all inside
* Trust her, you know she have a wickedness
* No cartoon junkie
* But me her Superman
* Call me up front
* Me give her what she want
* Call out cool name
* Give her the tree trunk
* From the sofa to the chaise
* Side, back and front
- Hey, yo, Pooch.
Why don't you go in there and get me something to drink,
man, so I can look at your ass?
- Why don't you go in the kitchen
and get your own drink and look at your own ass?
How about that?
* Shorty got it twisted
* I'm the motherfucking man
* I said your boy going last
* And this is what she had
- Damn it.
* Shorty worked out in the gym like what
* She like when I say
* Go on girl, throw it up
* Thicker than a mother fucker
* I ain't goin' front
* I cave man that shit
* Pump, pump, pump, pump
* Now she's saying
- Damn, sweetie.
Can I buy you a house?
Give you my bank account number and my ATM card?
I'll kill your boyfriend if you can't get away from him.
- You know what?
You need to be slapped for saying some shit like that.
Is he for real?
- We just happen to be together.
I don't know this motherfucker.
- Go.
* Now she's saying shit like
* Boy you the truth
* Now I'm saying shit like yup, you too
* Now she's saying shit like what we gonna do
* I need another round, put my girl down, too
* Now her girl down, too
* Shit, Gemini nigga
* Tell a bitch quick, I ain't no minute man nigga
* Tell a bitch quick, I'm a caveman nigga
* Tell a bitch quick
* Tizak nigga, ay
* To the sexy body girl
* Dirty rocking tonight
- Ooh.
Real nice up in here.
- It's alright, I like it.
(soft jazz music)
(upbeat music)
(record scratching)
- Who was you staring at so damn hard like that?
Don't get your face worked on up in here.
- I'm saying, what you talking about?
Man, I smile at people 'cause I'm a friendly person.
- Yeah, a'ight.
- I'm not rude. - I'm not rude.
- Hey man, every time we go somewhere you always
trying to, like you always got something-
- Nigga, yo ass don't know how to act around a female.
That's what the situation is.
- I know how to act around you.
I'm around you.
I act around you every day.
- Somebody else, somebody else.
- You know what?
Look at this, okay.
I'm running to the bathroom, I'll be right back.
(upbeat music)
- Hey, girl.
- Yeah, you got the green light.
If you can get this motherfucker,
please do me the favor and do that.
- You sure you really want me to do this?
- Can't stand his ass.
- I know he a little funny looking,
but I can still work with him.
- Alright now, that's still my husband.
- A'ight.
- I promise there won't be no hard feelings.
Just get this fucking dickhead.
- Okay.
- Hey yo, I'm about to go get something to drink.
What you want?
- Boy, as long as we been together,
and you still don't know what I like?
- Girl, as long as we been together,
you still don't know what you like.
- Well, if you were consistent in your spending range,
I would be drinking the same thing
on a consistent basis,
and we wouldn't be having this conversation.
So what are you getting me?
A bottle or a fucking mixed drink?
- Well, you 'bout to get some water out the bathroom
in a cup if yo ass keep it up.
Sherita, I swear to God,
like you gonna miss me when I'm gone.
Like for real, for real, dead ass.
- Bet I don't.
Fucking cheating ass nigga.
I can't stand his ass.
* When you see me in the club
* Best believe I got my gun on me
* My shirt Grey Goose, my pants cranberry
* Little shorty love that drink
* So she sat near me
* Diamonds in my ear, made my head bop chill
* Even knows to give me shots
- So was that smile for me,
or do you smile like that for all the ladies?
- I mean, it depends on how you took it.
- Well, I'm taking it as you trying to holla,
but you don't want ya girl to notice.
- I mean, that's possible.
Hey, yo, bartender, let me get a bottle of Rose.
Matter of fact get me two of them shits.
Not that cheap shit, and get her whatever she wants too.
* Man, I'm flyer than a motherfucker
* Shirt match shoe
* And can't a nigga in here match my cool
* When you see me in the club, nigga
* I just wanna get my club on
* I got a bottle
- Oh shit.
See why not.
How you doin'?
- I'm fine.
- Please tell me you're here alone right now.
- Well, sorry to disappoint ya, playa.
- Hey, my fault. Lucky man.
- Who said it was a man?
- Hey yo, bartender.
All this money I'm spending up in here,
and you got me waiting like this?
It ain't really even hardly nobody up in here right now.
I really hope you're not expecting a tip, like for real.
* They know they can't fuck with her
* She like to brag to her friends all night
* And I swear on my mother and father
(bartender speaking in a foreign language)
- Well, I don't know what you just said,
but I like it, so okay.
We good.
- Listen, I know this is a little old school,
but if you really trying to make moves,
I suggest you take this napkin
before the bartender pick it up.
- Well shit, I'ma just take this thing right now.
Yo, so who the fuck that was, you was talking to?
- Nobody.
Just somebody trying to get what you got.
Keep on fucking up.
This damn drink, shit.
(upbeat music)
- Aw, baby I missed you.
- That's what's up, what we doin' tonight, man?
I'm bored.
- Let's go have some drinks.
- Let's go have some drinks?
- Yeah.
- I don't know.
You know I ain't really fuckin' with the drinks right now,
but we can go do something.
(record scratching)
- So, this is what the fuck you doing with yourself?
- Yo, what is you doing?
- What is this? - What am I doing?
What the fuck is you doing?
- Yo, let me explain.
Timeout, let me explain. - You got the next bitch
riding up on the car.
- Yo, no, let me talk, let me talk.
I'ma need you, to back the fuck up from this car,
and I'm gonna need you to get out so I can handle this shit.
Y'all wilding.
- Okay, I'ma get out,
'cause you're definitely gonna handle this.
- Whatever, man.
Y'all buggin' right now, man.
(tires screeching)
- Well, since you got me kicked out the car,
can you give me a ride home?
- Bitch, give yourself a ride.
The fuck I look like?
(soft music)
* Leave me alone, leave me alone
- Yo, yo, yo.
Hey ladies, how are y'all doin' today?
Ooh, you look nice.
Your man know you out here lookin' like this?
Woo!
Damn, bro, did you see her, man?
You see the way she looked at me though, dude?
I don't know what's up with that.
- You find out, Diamond.
You gonna try some dick?
- Do you see the wedding ring?
And see that's why I hate men.
- I didn't see it. - Speaking of wedding rings,
why haven't we met this man of yours yet?
- I've been thinking the same damn thing.
- Well, I mean, bringing home a man to meet y'all
is like bringing home a man to meet my mom.
I've gotta make sure he's the one first.
- Aw, that's so sweet.
Bitch, you been saying that for a year now.
Like really.
Excuses.
- I mean, he cool and all,
I'm just not sure if he's ready for y'all.
- Thank you. - You're welcome.
Enjoy. - Thank you.
- You're welcome. - Ready for us?
- What's wrong with us?
- Yes, y'all bitches,
'cause y'all done scared away a few niggas I was digging.
- I mean, maybe one or two, but...
- Well, if we scared anybody away,
it's clearly because they wasn't the right one for you.
We ain't going nowhere,
so they just gonna have to get used to that.
- Damn straight. - My point exactly.
(gentle music)
* Ooh
* Ooh bae
* Let me out
* Don't knock it till you try it
* Let me do that for you
- Damn bitch, you lookin' at that girl ass
like you fresh out.
Shit, if I ain't know any better,
I say you like women now.
No offense, Diamond.
- None taken, but you know,
shorty is fine as hell though.
Who do you think she's with?
- I don't give a damn who she here with,
I ain't trying to bag the bitch.
What's wrong with y'all?
And Poochie, since when you start liking ass anyway?
- Since I met you.
- Thank you. - Thank you.
- You're welcome, enjoy. - Thanks.
- Bitch, don't you be doing that shit in here,
people gonna be thinking we bumping uglies.
- Oh, so would you rather we do it at your house?
- Shay, you better be careful,
she gonna have you pinned up against a wall somewhere.
(laughing)
- You bitches is not getting my booty.
- Don't knock it till you try it.
- I'm not trying it,
so I'm gonna knock the fuck out of it.
- Hater.
- You know I'm always down for new things, it's just sex.
- Well, experience some new dick then,
bitch, 'cause you buggin' right now.
- That is something I never wanna experience.
Just the thought of it turns my stomach.
- A good big dick will turn the shit out your stomach.
Let me be the first to tell you,
when that shit start stroking you,
you goin' feel that shit all in your throat.
And what'd you say?
Don't knock it till you try it?
Shit.
- Okay, sure, I'll try it.
The moment you 69 a female
is the moment I will bend over for a man,
'cause you know what?
I don't even wanna see his face.
God, it's just grossing me out just thinking about it.
- Wait, so you never been penetrated by a man before?
- Not a woman either.
I mean, I don't do dildos,
and I definitely don't want some shit up in me
squirting some shit out either.
You know what?
Men are just not my thing.
I hate them motherfuckers,
I swear to God, no.
I hate the President of the United States, I do.
I hate Morris Chestnut's fine black ass.
- Okay, now you buggin'.
- Okay.
I hate the richest man in America,
and I don't even know who the fuck that is.
I hate the mothafucka behind us,
and I never even met his ass either.
- With the ring on the finger. - I totally just, fucking,
just guys just drive me-
- Okay, we get it, I'm just sayin',
like you know, you should try it, just at least one time.
- Yeah, and you should try these nipples in your mouth,
how 'bout that?
- I said I wanted to try something new with my sex life,
not completely give up dick.
- I'm good.
That's nasty.
(girls laughing)
- [Poochie,] This nigga look like a fucking predator.
Oh, and he got a bitch girl.
- He is so disrespectful
Watch your man girl, I'm just saying.
- Damn, bitch, we literally just got here
and you bein' rude already!
Why you bein' so disrespectful?
- Your man disrespectful, honey.
Why he staring at us all googly eyed
and shit and he here with you?
Shit, I'm just trying to save you
the embarrassment of his cheap looking ass.
I just did you a favor, but I think you could do better.
Shit, I don't know.
- See?
I told you 'bout niggas like him.
Ha, I told you about that nigga.
- See?
And that's why I hate the motherfuckers.
But your ass, now that is a different story,
hmm, sexy thing. - Diamond!
Diamond!
- Girl, bye.
She is just playing with you,
don't nobody want y'all but y'all.
Deuces.
- You know, it's time to go, let's go.
Let's go, now.
- Diamond. - Bye-bye.
- Diamond.
Diamond.
- And Diamond, you're crazy ass, you trying-
- I'm was looking at that, honestly.
- I mean, I was looking too, but you ain't got-
- You ain't supposed to just make a pass...
- Shut up. Whatever. - And he got
a whole girlfriend.
(upbeat music)
- Excuse me, not trying to be funny or nothing, but-
- But I'm not interested.
- Whoa, that mean to everyone
who gives you a compliment?
- Who said I'm mean?
I just said I wasn't interested.
- Not yet.
- Not ever.
I don't like dick.
(upbeat music)
- Shit, me either.
- Man, I don't even know why you wasting your time,
you ain't got shit she wants.
(upbeat music)
- Hi baby! - Hey.
- Thank you for picking me up. - It's no problem.
- So how was your day?
- It was good, we were hanging out,
me and Reba, you know, I'm doing good.
What?
- You know what bitch?
You been slipping up an awful lot lately.
- I don't know what the hell you talkin' 'bout.
- Really?
Who the hell lipstick is on your collar?
And you know what?
Go ahead and lie to me, so I can slap the left cheek
off your face through the right side of your mouth.
- Bitch, you ever hit me like that,
I promise your ass is gonna come up missing immediately.
- Why you always trying to play me?
I know you cheating on me.
- Damn ma, why you be trippin'?
It was a friend of mine that I saw earlier
that I haven't seen in a while, she gave me a hug.
It was me and Reba.
- It's always you and Reba.
When is it gonna be Stacey and Diamond?
Take my fucking ass home.
You know what, forget it, I'm just gonna walk.
I'm just gonna walk instead.
I don't know why you're getting out the fucking car.
You know, if I wanted to be cheated on,
I'd be dealing with these fucking lame ass men around here.
I hate, I really hate the fact that I love you so much,
but you know what?
That's okay, go ahead,
keeping playing and see if this ass whooping
that I'm gonna give you don't go viral,
and the next bitch, I swear to god,
she's gonna fucking learn.
- You know what, I'mma call you later.
- Don't fucking bother, bitch.
- You know what?
You right, you right.
Hello, Reba?
Yo.
Fuckin' up, yep, yep, I'm coming over right now.
Yeah, alright, alright then.
Yo Reba, open up!
Yo, open up.
- Oh my god bro, what are you doing?
- Yo, can I talk? - No, man!
- Yo, can I talk first? - No man!
- [Stacey] Yo, listen, you're not even listening.
- Look, I don't wanna hear it man.
- You gotta listen to this.
- No man, I don't wanna hear it,
you always put me in this shit, bro.
- Stop playing with me, yo, just listen!
- Goddamn bro, I hope you know
what you're getting into, man.
- Listen, listen, yo, I'm in the doghouse again!
- Oh my god, what the fuck did you do this time?
- Shorty saw lipstick on my collar.
I didn't even fucking know it was there.
- Are you kidding me?
Really?
You're a grown ass fucking woman, well,
woman, woman, whatever.
The difference is is that I'm single
and you're in a committed relationship.
I can come home with lipstick on my collar.
You can't.
How'd you let this shit happen?
- I was with shorty last night,
she didn't give me time to take my clothes off
when I got there.
Good thing I was strapped though.
It was late, we fell asleep,
and next thing I know,
Diamond is texting me to come pick her up from the gym,
because she decided to fucking run there this morning.
But you right, it's my fault for getting caught up.
- Time out, hold up.
You tellin' me you had on the same clothes
from last night when you went to go
pick up Diamond this morning?
And you ain't wash your ass?
- I didn't have time, I rushed straight out the crib.
- I'mma need you to rush your ass straight to the shower.
- Whatever bitch, yo if I smell like anything
I smell like potpourri,
because shorty had the shit on fresh,
so fuck what you talkin' about.
- You still gonna take that shower though, right?
(upbeat music)
(dog barking)
- Oh shit.
- You look like you need a little assistance.
- Oh my fucking god, are you stalking me?
- Don't flatter yourself shorty,
I just moved in the apartments up the block.
Lucky you. - Yeah, lucky me.
- Stop acting stuck up.
Allow me to help you with your bags.
- Well thanks, but no thanks.
And I ain't stuck up.
- That's not what it appears to be right now.
- Oh great, another guest.
- Yo, what the fuck you doing, man?
Yo Diamond, what the fuck is this?
- I guarantee you, it ain't what you think.
- It sure isn't. - I just moved in up-
- Yo, I don't give a fuck where you live, alright?
This is my girl, fam.
- I get it.
Just know her from the gym,
she looked like she needed a little assistance,
so I figured I'd be a gentleman and help her out.
I know if she was my girl,
I'd make sure I met her
as soon as she stepped foot out the damn door.
But it's your world, homie.
- Thank you, alright?
Look, we're good here.
- Stacey, what the hell are you doing here?
I didn't say anything about you coming back.
- Yo, that's because you don't give me
fucking permission to come and go, alright?
I come and go as I fucking please,
so how about you come and open this fucking door?
Yo homie, why the fuck you still standing here?
Alright?
I don't need you checking shit about mine, you dig, a'ight?
- I got you,
but you know, what the fuck ever.
Y'all have a good night.
- Yeah, be out, I'm all on you!
(dramatic music)
- You need to be all over her,
before somebody else is,
and stop talking to me like I'm some type of lame.
(heartbeat thumping)
If you don't remember, you're still a female.
Or must I remind you.
- Yo Diamond, get the fuck inside!
- Wait, you just, you know what-
- Yo, why didn't you fucking tell me
Iron Man was fucking here, what the hell?
* Nigga fucking with the wrong bitch
* When all the other niggas wanna get to me
* But women feel the same shit
* I don't know where we went wrong
* Replay, this bitch play the same song
* Oowee, niggas gettin' tired o' that
* New year, same me, new track
* Huh, what
* I heard it all before shorty
* Ain't no reason to get hype on this track shorty
* I keep it real clear just to get my point across
* If you ain't shit, I tell you quick bitch, fuck y'all
* And every time we talk you always put my money in it
(phone vibrating)
* Huh, what, and now you want me to go
* I been gone bitch, with the wind, with the flow
* Ain't no reason to talk about it
* Now you see the figures
* Everything I do I make money, get it nigga
- So what you got planned for today?
- Shit, nothing,
shooting the shit with the fellas, why, what up?
- I figure, you know,
we could do something for a change, do something.
- Sorry baby, I already got plans.
- Well, I'm going to get my hair done
and go chill with the girls, so,
don't do nothing I wouldn't do.
- Nah baby, you know it's all about you,
you already know that, all day.
- Yeah, a'ight, well,
I'm 'bout to go, so I'll catch you later.
- You ain't bout to catch me doin' shit.
I got some new shit lined up, understand me! Ha!
(soft music)
- Hello? - What's up girl, you home?
- Yeah, I had today off.
- [Poochie] Should've told me you had the day off.
On my way.
- A'ight.
* All I think about is my baby
* There ain't nobody else as fun as you baby
* I know that I'm your lady
* Can't believe I fell in love with my best friend
- Hey bitch! I like!
- Thank you.
- Where was you at today? - Went to the hair salon.
- Oh, I like it!
- Damn ma, where you goin' looking all sexy and shit?
- Girl, I told this knucklehead we could do something today.
- Let me find out nigga's making plans and shit,
definitely gotta be him.
Ah shit, who dickin' my girl down? (chuckling)
- Shit, that's about it,
'cause we argue 90% of the time. (sighing)
I wouldn't be surprised if this nigga canceled.
- What, the fuck? (chuckling)
Oh so you're with a nigga that's making plans
and can possibly cancel?
The dick that good?
This the nigga you hiding from us?
- I'm not hiding him, but yeah,
it's good and it's convenient.
- Mm-mm.
- What's wrong, Pooch?
- Well dead ass, I think I'm done with men.
Like,
I'm tired of convincing myself, it is what it is,
like I think I want a girlfriend.
- What Top Cat do now?
- Now you know damn well he doin' him, first of all.
Second of all, I mean, I'm serious though,
like I really think I like girls.
I get turned on by fat asses just like men do.
You know, a girl with nice legs and nice tits
and a nice walk to go with it.
- Mm-hm.
- I mean, am I gay?
- I mean probably, yeah so.
- Look at you, you dope as fuck.
I mean you the type of girl I would date.
- Well bitch, you can get that out your mind now,
for one, you're married, and for two,
I like dick way too much, and you used to too at one point,
and I think you should go back to liking dick.
This whole conversation would be different.
Oh yeah, and you married.
- Uh, fuck him.
I mean, he's the reason I got resentment
towards men anyway, they ain't shit.
- You know what you need?
A threesome.
- Yo, that's what I'm talking about,
two nice dope-ass girls or some-
- No bitch, no.
No, two niggas, with dicks.
You could call 'em now and later, like the candy.
One for now, and one for later.
That'd keep your mind off this pussy.
Oh, and did I mention, you're married.
- I mean,
if I came up to you, and I did this.
* I promise
* How can you say
* You don't like it
* When you never, never had it baby
* No, no, no, no
- Would you stop me?
* Taste it
* Don't knock it till you try it
* Let me do that for you babe
- Snap out of it, bitch.
You ain't about to practice on me
and get ready for them thots out on the streets.
You need to go talk to Diamond about this shit.
- Okay, I will, let's go talk to her then,
'cause you ain't being a real friend anyway.
- Yeah, yeah, let's do that,
and keep your little funky ass off of me.
You know Diamond like this shit anyway.
- Well, let's go to Diamond house then.
- You serious, huh?
You really like pussy though?
Like for real?
No, for real, I'm shocked,
like you never really did answer my question.
(phone vibrating)
Um, Poochie, hello?
You listenin'?
I really don't think that's a good idea,
like did you really think about this?
What's your moms gonna say?
You know gay people get discriminated on
all the time, right?
Shit, look at Diamond,
look what she going though,
and been going through,
and still going through.
And bitch, you fuckin' married, what's wrong with you?
(Poochie sighs)
- Bitch, let's just go to Diamond's house.
- [TV] What's going on with James?
You know, I really don't like him.
(knocking)
- Diamond!
(knocking)
Open the door.
- Hey! - Hey!
How you doin' beautiful? - How are you?
Good, how are you?
- Come on in, hi.
- Hi.
- Come on in, sit down.
You guys want a drink? - Of course.
- Damn chica, where you going tonight?
- You gay.
- [Diamond] Nowhere in particular, but you know me,
I'm always ready for whatever. - Thank you.
So, what's the plan?
- The plan is not to turn this bitch into you,
she don't know if she want pussy or dick.
You got some good dick doctor?
- Why the fuck would I have that?
- I don't know.
- Anyway, fuck this bitch, okay,
I really do wanna talk about this though, Diamond.
- Okay, what do you wanna know?
- Well, you know, how did it start off for you,
you know, how did it happen?
- I think for me,
it started when I noticed
that I was checking out women's asses,
and like every guy that tried to talk to me,
I gave them reasons not to like me.
I would do stupid shit like turn them on,
get them all nice and hard, and then go home.
(laughing) - What a waste.
- I just wanted like, get to know their sisters,
their female cousins.
Get drunk and forget what we did type of shit.
I just couldn't see myself
lettin' some man up inside me.
- Well, what's the difference between dick and a dildo,
there's still penetration.
- Um, I don't do dildos.
For me, it's like when a woman touches you,
and how she feels, she touches you how she wants to feel.
So like the moment you're together
you can feel her skin is so soft,
and then she knows like exactly
where to put her tongue, it's just like-
- Ah, I don't wanna hear about you and Stacey's funky asses,
I ain't come over here for that.
Look at this, you got this bitch drooping
in the fucking chair and shit.
I don't get what turns y'all on about bumping uglies,
it's just nasty.
- Don't knock it till you try it, honey.
- The only shit that's gonna knock over here
is these walls when my man hitting it right in that
with no plastic shit.
- Well, it wasn't all cake mix though, Pooch.
I mean, for me, it caused a lot of problems in my family,
and people that I thought were my friends,
they started acting funny towards me.
Like if they even thought I was talking to a girl,
rumors were going around flying about
how I'm fucking her, or I'm liking her,
and I tried to explain to them, it's not like that.
I mean, we have criteria,
we have a preference,
it's not like I wanna fuck every woman
that walks by, you know?
- Yeah, I understand that. - So you say.
- And all these strictly dickly bitches-
- That would be me.
- Whenever they find out,
or they know somebody is gay,
they make sure they go out their way to let it be known
that they don't eat pussy, like bitch,
that's why you in the straight category.
You can leave us lesbians alone with your weird asses.
- You know what my opinion is?
You know what you need?
Some dick.
* And I'm telling you
There ain't nothing like it.
And you white, so you should get some black dick
so you know what I'm talking about.
- I am never gonna get me some black dick,
but I don't mind getting me a new black woman.
- New?
Uh, the fuck?
- Well, I know Stacey's cheating on me.
- That bitch, let me beat her ass.
(phone beeps)
- You know what?
Let's just get out of here,
I wanna go fucking dancing, can we just go?
Please?
- Come on, let's go. - Come on, y'all,
let's go take her out real quick.
- Okay, you got it.
- [Shay] This is an uppity ass neighborhood.
- Damn Poppie, you can't even see me?
- I told you, I was, like what took you so long though?
- What's up with you and your girl?
- I'm saying I ain't come over here
to talk about that, you know what I'm saying?
You know I got a situation with her,
but I ain't worried about that right now.
- Well come on in here,
I need you to do something, alright?
* We can just chill if he you to
- Bitch, get down, shit.
What the fuck? - I'm out, I gotta go.
- Pooch, what are you doing? - I gotta go, I gotta go.
- Bitch, what? - Why are we here?
- Just, it's all a part of the plan.
Just follow me and shut the fuck up.
- Oh my god, we're going to jail.
- You ain't, you ain't!
* If he wants to
* If I front a feel, what you goin' do
- Is this a white person's house?
- Why this gotta be a white person's house?
- 'Cause bitch, the door's unlocked
and we right off Lodi, ain't no nice streets off Lodi!
- Would y'all shut the fuck up?
- You're the one sneaking in houses,
like, why are we here?
- We're going to jail, not you.
- I'm serious.
This is nice as fuck.
This is a nice house.
- I mean, we broke in the right house though.
- Shh, shh, shh.
- Why are we still crouching?
All the lights are on.
- [Poochie] Is this mother fuck...
- God damn.
* Can't wait to get my hands all on that body
* She got this big dick busting off like a shotty
- Damn, ma, what's going on?
I aint doing it right or something?
(crickets chirping)
- Damn Poppie, you almost had it,
but you a married man and I don't respect your gangsta,
but thanks for the head though.
- Damn man, so y'all been setting me up
this whole time?
- You been planning to fuck me this whole time?
- No, no, Pooch, hold on, man.
- Nah, you good.
You got that on camera, right love?
- I sure do, it's in the cloud.
- Wi-fi, bitch ass nigga.
- Oh, come on y'all, yo Pooch, hold up.
- I'mma need you to get up out of here
before shit get ugly.
- How much more ugly can you get than that?
Hm.
- Nasty nigga. - No good piece of shit.
But seriously, that should of been me down here.
- Pooch, are you okay?
- Yeah.
- I know that was a messed up sight to see,
but it is what you wanted.
- You know we good, momma. - I know.
- You know I got you too.
- Wait a minute, you been planning this the whole time?
- Yeah, oh that's some real boss shit
right there, you my girl.
Not like that, you know, you's just my bitch.
I gotta be specific with you,
'cause you might take that shit the wrong way.
- Girl, if I wanted your pussy,
trust me, I'll get it.
- Bitch, my name is not Top Cat, you got me fucked up.
- Wait, wait, wait, if he's out there,
what are we gonna do if he comes at us?
I mean, where we gonna run to?
- Run?
Girl, that's some white people shit,
we don't fucking run, what the hell's wrong with you?
- It's okay, we gonna teach you, come on.
- Oh shit, we going to jail.
- I mean, you could bail us out, right?
(Poochie sighs)
You okay girl?
- Y'all, this is why I can't stand niggas.
This is why.
Seven years, y'all, seven years,
that was my husband y'all,
and he goin' throw that away
over some pussy he ain't even get.
- Well, he was licking the fuck out her shit, though.
- Talkin' 'bout he all about me
and all this other crap,
and that's why I put Bella on him and show people
that he ain't shit, niggas ain't shit, I can't.
- He's a piece of shit.
- Well, you did put a bad bitch on him,
I mean, I might of tried to fuck you too,
and I don't even get down like that.
I'm saying though, you bad as fuck.
Bravo bitch, that's a good plan, you know?
- You're annoying, I swear.
- But it's a silver lining,
like she got what she want. - Bitch, let's just go.
- What?
- [Poochie] I gotta deal with this shit anyway, let's go.
Thank you, baby. - Bye, Bella.
- You were wearing that dress,
looking all sexy and shit.
- Diamond. - I'm coming.
(soft music)
(Poochie crying)
- Don't cry, Pooch.
You goin' mess your face up.
How you gonna get a nigga then?
He had a small dick anyway you told me.
You too pretty for that.
He fucked up, not you.
There's plenty of niggas out here,
you could have anybody you want.
But pussy got the power,
and you shouldn't have put that powerful bitch on him.
Should've chose like an ugly bitch with a fat ass
and no edges, 'cause they definitely out here,
not a bitch that got the whole package.
Shit, who the fuck would say no to that?
Shit, the way she was moaning had my pussy wet,
I'm just saying though.
- A real man would say no,
and why you cuss so damn much?
- 'Cause that's what the fuck I do, I cuss.
So you gonna get mad at me now 'cause I'm cussing?
Shit, bitch, hell, damn, ass, motherfucker, so there.
Man, nigga, I'm fucking going in the house,
I don't got time for this shit.
I'll call you tomorrow, motherfucker.
Shit.
Damn, fucked up because of that kind of shit.
(dramatic music)
Mad at me 'cause I'm cussing.
Hey.
- Hey my ass, where the fuck you been all goddamn day?
(dog barking)
- Huh?
I'm a grown ass woman Rello and my father dead,
what the fuck is wrong with you?
- Bitch!
You don't stay out all goddamn day
without checking in with a nigga.
- Are you fucking kidding me, Rello?
I gotta check the fuck in,
but you can stay out as long as you fucking want to?
Fuck you, nigga.
- Bitch!
Every time you disrespect me
I'm going to punish you.
Disrespect me again.
(upbeat music)
(dramatic music)
(phone vibrating)
- Hello?
Hey girl.
Nothing, on my lunch break at this cafe.
Yeah.
Yeah, let me call you back though.
Okay, a'ight.
- Is this seat taken?
- Do you see anybody sitting here?
- Damn, are you always this mean?
- Are you always this annoying?
Didn't I see you somewhere?
- Oh yeah, so we meet again.
- I mean, we didn't meet the first time,
so I wouldn't say again pretty boy.
- May I sit?
- No, I mean you can sit,
but it's only gonna make me move somewhere else.
- Look, I ain't trying to scare you off or none of that,
but before you go, can I at least get your name?
- If that's gonna make you disappear, then why not.
My name is Poochie, and I'm still not single.
- Well look, Poochie,
when you ready for somebody to put a smile on your face,
why don't you just give me a call?
- When you're ready for somebody to sit on your face,
you give me a call.
- Shit, don't threaten me with a good time.
Sherita.
Cute name. - Half of y'all
could arouse me sexually,
physically manipulate my extremities,
put me in a good position to have sex with me,
but can you penetrate me intellectually?
Can you move my body by only standing next to me?
Or maybe I gave you the impression that
it was okay to do me disrespectfully.
Don't return a phone call or a text from me,
coming in and out of my life unexpectedly.
I'm sorry, but do you see a stupid girl standing next to me?
'Cause clearly you have me confused
with one that likes to be treated neglectfully.
Or maybe it's not y'all at all, maybe it's me.
Maybe I'm so cold and guarded and tainted-hearted,
and I gave you a false reality
on the things I started.
Maybe I allow ones to occupy my mind
knowing the expiration date
will only be a matter of time.
Nina Purhenn.
(upbeat music)
- What girl can resist this?
(laughing)
- So this what you been thinking about all day?
(phone vibrating)
(groaning)
- Hello? - I'm hungry.
- The hell are you telling me for?
Interrupting me for this shit.
Take your ass and get something to eat.
- I was thinking about taking you up on your offer.
- You don't waste no time, do you?
Well, eating me can be very addicting,
so I was thinking maybe you can feed me first?
You know, and then if the day goes by right,
maybe I'll decide whether or not you can taste the rainbow.
- Feed you first?
What you wanna eat, some dick?
- Dick?
Did this nigga just?
I don't eat dick, boy.
- So am I meeting you somewhere,
or am I picking you up?
- Yeah, I got my own car.
Shit, I don't know you,
and a chick might need to get away immediately, you feel me?
- A'ight.
We can meet on a boulevard somewhere,
like around eight.
- Well, that's a start.
And one, you're blocked, and trust me, I'm not playing.
- Just answer when I call.
- Mm-hm.
- Bitch don't even know what she in for.
Break her ass off, too.
- You look nice.
Where you going?
I'm trying to come.
- Shit, I was planning on going out
with the fellas around eight.
- Typical.
You always trying to go hang out with the fellas,
but never wanna hang out with me.
- Why is it that every time
I wanna hang out with the fellas, you wanna do something,
but you don't wanna do shit no other time?
- I'm always trying to hang out with you Rello,
but you too busy going off with the fellas.
I'm starting to think you fucking them niggas,
'cause you ain't fucking me,
unless you taking my shit.
You know what?
I can't remember the last time
I even got excited looking at your fucking face,
but you know what?
That's okay.
So who is the bitch?
- If I was fucking another bitch,
it still wouldn't matter
because your ass still ain't going nowhere,
'cause the dick too good.
- You think I'm with you
'cause you fucking fucking me good?
Fuck out of here, nigga,
you can kiss my ass.
I'm so done with the disrespect.
You know what? I'm out of here.
You can go fuck whoever the fuck you wanna fuck.
- If that's what I chose to do,
then so be it, but that's not what's going on,
like I'm tired of your accusations about what I'm doing.
You know what I'm saying?
That shit is fucking me up.
That's the type of shit that push a nigga away.
- Oh please, you so full of shit.
You wanna go, just go, making up reasons
to leave the house and shit.
Just keep it real with me,
like I'm a big girl, I can take it.
- Look, you can think what you wanna think.
No matter what I say, you're not gonna believe me, anyways,
but I suggest you be quiet,
'cause you really irritating the fuck out of me,
but didn't you say you was leaving?
- Didn't you say your ass was leaving?
I don't give a fuck, yeah,
you get your wish, bye.
- You know what?
Maybe your ass shouldn't leave,
but in regards to all things,
your ass better be back here tonight,
not morning, you hear?
And while you out, make sure you bring another bitch,
so I can fuck the shit out of her,
but in the meantime, get the fuck out of my face.
- Fuck you.
Get the fuck out of here, gonna get dressed.
(door closes)
- [Man] We're gonna make this really quick you heard?
- [Man] I don't want that.
(dramatic music)
(gun fires)
- Oh fuck.
(gun fires)
He shot the nigga. What?
- Make sure you cut your phone off, stupid.
- She shot the nigga.
- [Woman] Next time bitch, wait till you see,
I'll shoot that nigga again.
- [Woman] Girl you're...
(laughing)
- Oh shit.
Hello?
- What's up girl?
- Hey, why you FaceTiming me?
- Uh, I wanna see your face. (chuckling)
What's up?
- You gay.
(Poochie chuckling)
Gay ass.
(Poochie chuckling)
- What's up?
- Nothing, I'm sitting on the couch.
I was all dressed up, ready to go out,
but I turned on I got this, now I'm stuck.
I have to watch (indistinct) next.
What you doing?
- Shit, I'm about to go on this date
with this fine ass man, girl,
and I think he wanna taste the rainbow.
- Oh, he told you that already?
- That's what he indicated when I met his ass.
Girl, I'mma fuck the shit out this nigga face.
I'm trying to nut in this niggas nostrils
and his eyeballs, bitch.
Choke, nigga! (laughing)
- Bitch, you stupid, bitch, you stupid. (laughing)
Shit, I wish me and my man was doing
some freaky shit like that.
Wait a minute, I thought you wanted a girlfriend?
- I mean, I do, but I'm just testing
the waters right now, you know.
This guy seems kinda interesting,
and Top Cat is no longer a fucking factor,
so I'll do what the hell I wanna do.
But forget all that though, I'll cancel all this
if you let me rub you down.
- The fuck?
Bitch, anyways, you better not let Top Cat see you,
you know he ain't wrapped too tight, right?
He catch you, he ain't letting you go that easy.
- Top Cat gonna fuck around
and get his ass whooped, but listen,
you and ya boo should come meet us.
You know I need a escape plan,
so if this nigga don't do or say the right shit,
I'm walking out and leaving that nigga stuck with the bill.
(laughing)
- Ain't he suppose to pay anyways?
- Uh, not after I order a whole bunch of shit I don't want.
Every time he say some dumb shit,
I'm ordering some dumb shit.
You know every nigga hate when a bitch
order some shit and don't eat it. (laughing)
- Bitch, you stupid.
Bitch, you stupid.
I'm fucking done. - Yes.
- Nah, my man out hanging out with the fellas,
so you on your own tonight, call me tomorrow.
- I guess, bye. - Later.
- It's real nice out here tonight.
- Yeah, nice little breeze.
So, Mr. Keith, tell me about yourself.
You know, you're out on a date with me,
so that means you're single, right?
- Yeah, I most definitely am single.
Been through a lot with women.
Tell myself the next time I have to be more careful,
can't always trust a big butt and cute smile.
I had to learn the hard way.
- So you're into fat asses and cute smiles, huh?
- I mean, that was at, you know,
a certain point in my life,
you know, my young, dumb days.
- So not to toot my own horn, but beep beep.
I got a fat ass and I got a cute smile,
so why are we sitting at the table right now?
- Hey, every woman is different.
It's all about how you carry yourself.
But as I said, that's all I was about then.
Times have changed, just a little.
- Damn, nigga.
- What?
- You drinking like that is a sign of alcoholism.
- Drinking like that is the sign of a stressful day.
I'll take it easy on the next one.
- That shit is not funny, like how many DWIs you got?
- None, I don't drink and drive.
- So okay, correct me if I'm wrong.
You drove here, right? - Mm-hm.
- You just took that down like a motherfucker,
'bout to get another one.
Am I missing something here?
- Okay, I see where this is going,
so let me break it down for you.
I'm a 30 year old man.
No kids, never been married,
very interested in getting to know you.
Do I drink?
Yes, I drink.
Am I alcoholic?
Far from it, and I got a very successful job,
et cetera, et cetera, but that's not what I'm here for.
I'm here for you, so tell me about you.
- Okay, well, 28 year old,
separated, 'bout to get the divorce.
Um, boss bitch, you already know how that works. (laughing)
No kids, don't plan on having any,
and you know, with the whole no kids thing,
most guys find that a turn off, so if that is a turn off,
let me know, 'cause I could be up out.
I won't waste your time,
you know how that goes.
- Okay, straight to the point, huh?
- Yeah, pretty much.
- So, what do you do for fun?
- Not much, you know, I hang out with my friends,
who are pretty much like me.
- Maybe I could meet them one day.
- Maybe.
(soft music)
- You okay?
- Yeah, my bad, just thinking about something.
Can we order now?
Um, I need my food. - Yeah, I was thinking
the same thing, I need another drink.
- You need another drink, huh? (laughing)
(upbeat music)
- Next bitch that walks by. - Next bitch that go by,
I'mma get a handful of that ass bitch,
and she ain't gonna do shit.
Man, I'm telling you cuz,
these New York bitches be the easiest of them all, man.
I can get a handful of cheeks right now.
- Steady talking man.
- I'm telling you cuz- - I gotta see this shit, man,
you know what I'm saying?
- These bitches ain't shit up here.
- These bitches up here gonna fuck your ass up, man.
- Man, you talking that hella trash, man,
you extra zesty right now homie, I'm even telling you.
(laughing)
- Real bitches up here. - The next bitch that come by,
I tell you. - They don't play
that shit man. - You talking-
- You gotta have game, man,
you gotta have game, dog.
You feel me? - Man, you trippin' homie.
Next bitch that go by
I'mma get a handful of that ass, bitch.
- Okay, yeah nigga. - Yeah, homie.
Come on homie, let me get out on your side homie.
Come one, come on.
- What up dog? - You don't know me, homie.
Tell 'em. - You a fool, man,
let me see you do that shit up in here, man.
- Alright, you'll see. - Yeah, give me an entourage,
give me a couple of lukes and all that.
Damn, there's something else.
Yeah give me a lighter.
- Damn.
Shorty got a fat ass.
- Yo shorty, what's your name?
- Can I,
can I get a bundle, please? - She knows she hears us,
man, I can't stand no stuck up bitch yo.
- Yo shorty can get every inch of this dick, what.
- Can y'all give me three feet?
- Girl, I give you three minutes,
my crib, right now.
- Why y'all gotta be so fucking disrespectful?
And to make a long story short,
I'd rather bag your bitch and kick you niggas to the curb,
but to keep it simple, you niggas gotta be gay,
'cause ain't no way you could possibly
be getting a bitch the way y'all acting.
Back the fuck up before I do something to y'all.
- Shit.
(guys laughing)
- She says she's gonna-
- Your ass was scared. - Do something to you.
(laughing)
You better get your hit in first!
- This ain't over, man.
(guys laughing)
Shit. - Oh, boy.
- Thank you.
- You still think I'm gay?
I told you boy, I told you!
- Go playa.
Go on, get that.
(suspenseful music)
- What's good, yo?
Hold up, oh! - Bitch.
Don't touch me, you fucking ass.
I don't play that.
- Oh, shit!
- Stupid.
Think your ass will like this stick, nigga?
- Oh, shit. - What the fuck you gonna do
besides end up like this nigga?
- Bitch, is you crazy? - Yeah, that's what the
last motherfucker said when he sexually harassed me.
You wanna see some more of this crazy shit?
- Hell nah, listen baby- - You know what?
You look like you about to call the police.
I'mma beat your ass.
- What the fuck is you trying to?
- What you think this is. - Oh, listen, listen-
- I'm gonna finish your ass off too.
- [Man] Listen, just let me get my man
and get him out of here, alright?
- Next time you motherfuckers cross my path,
you better cross the fucking street.
- Okay, you got it. - Better yet,
stop disrespecting women!
- You got that, you got that.
Damn, dude.
(engine starts)
Crazy bitch!
(tires screeching)
Psyche, psyche, psyche!
Psyche.
- Damn.
- Fucked you up. - She fucked you up.
- Shut the fuck up man.
Get out of here man.
- Fuck you, man, that's why she fucked him up.
- [Man] I still won the bet.
* At full speed
* Let's go with it
* Sick of my pride
* And we could make somebody
* Let's get it poppin', here we go
* Ass is so fat, I know you ain't going nowhere with that
* Where your crew goin' be at
* And maybe you could get your backpack
* And chill at my crib
* 'Cause I'm a freak, and the flirt go
- Diamond, bitch.
Diamond, Diamond.
Open the door, let me come in.
Yo, you got some bleach or some shit
so I can clean this real quick?
Like, dead ass. - Holy hell, Poochie.
- What?
- What the fuck did you do?
- Okay, so the police looking for me,
I'm masked here, I had to beat some nigga ass
at the store for touching my ass,
like I need something to clean this,
I do not wanna go to fucking jail,
like I don't want to go to jail.
- Okay, hold on, calm down.
Are you fucking kidding?
You can't clean blood with bleach, okay?
- I need something to clean it please.
- Just come on, let's just go
throw this shit on the grill.
Come on, now.
(Poochie laughing)
- That's why I love you bitch,
because your ass is a rider.
You definitely ready to get down with a bitch.
Thank you very much, but yeah-
- That shit ain't funny.
You are not funny.
I really thought you were in trouble.
- Man, no police looking for me,
but I did have to beat the shit out the nigga,
'cause he wanted to touch my behind.
- Do me a favor, please take that shit
out of my house before you stain up my house.
Can't believe, you ain't funny.
- I'm a bad girl.
- You had me scared, for real.
- Sorry. - I need a drink.
You want a drink? - Of course, what you got?
- Some liquor, bitch, what else?
- Dang. - Some lemonade?
(girls chattering indistinctly)
(laughing)
* Bigger than the thing
* Yo, you can hate on me niggas
* But don't play with me niggas
* 'Cause I'm gonna break you niggas
* Yo I'm gonna fuck with your chicks
- Goddamn, bro, Poochie fine ass here, man,
she always so fucking mean, man.
- Yeah, what you gonna do about that?
- I don't fucking know, man,
I'm trying to hit that shit man.
She always being rude though.
- Yo, you might say she rude bro,
but I heard that shit claps back.
- I'mma get that shit, bro.
I'mma make that shit happen.
- Do that shit, but yo,
I know for a fact, my gaydar is on point right now,
'cause yo, she's definitely searching for somebody.
- Man, I'm searching for them speed bumps back there,
man, I'm trying to hit that shit.
(laughing)
Bro, fuck that man, what you doing with Diamond man?
- Yo, I'm just gonna do that shit on the fly
as I get to her, 'cause for real?
I don't know, I don't know what I'm gonna tell her.
- Well let's run up in this thing incognito,
they don't know we out here.
(laughing)
By the way man, change your fucking shirt man,
we matching and shit. - Shut the fuck up.
(laughing)
- So what happened, like what the fuck?
- First of all, bitch, the motherfucker,
I'm in line, right?
This nigga really gonna have the nerve to,
mother fucker is you touching me?
You know I do not play that shit.
(knocking)
- I bet you I know who the fuck that is.
(Poochie laughing)
- Good luck with that. (laughing)
(knocking)
- Nah, I bet I know who the fuck this is.
What the fuck you want?
- Oh come on, don't be like that.
You know I came here to apologize, what's up?
- Take your ass on inside.
- What up, kid? - Reba...
- What, I ain't do nothing!
- Just take your ass in the kitchen,
make yourself a drink with Poochie,
and don't be fucking with her, you know how she is.
- So I wanted to come by and apologize, I'm sorry.
But in my defense,
ain't everything always what it seems, right?
- Oh, this oughta be good.
- Mm, mm, mm, what's up Poochie?
- What's up Reba?
- Can I talk to you for a second?
- Mm-hm.
- Damn girl, why you so mean all the time?
- 'Cause you ain't shit,
just like the bitch out there.
Ain't none of my business though.
This drink is like very good.
- Okay so, to be honest,
right? - Mm-hm.
- I did see one of my exes from the past,
but I had to let her know I was trying to see somebody.
Yo stop playing, you- - Don't touch me.
Don't touch me.
- Alright, I won't touch you, alright?
But I gave her a hug, right,
and had to push her off,
I was like yo, chill out,
'cause you know, she's trying to kiss me and shit,
I didn't like that.
I didn't like that, you know, I only like you.
- You are so full of fucking shit.
- You serious, though?
Why you gotta be all like that?
How about you give yourself a chance to get to know me.
Maybe I could do some things
that make you think different about me.
Give me one night.
- Reba, I wouldn't fuck with you with Stacey's dick,
and if I was to fuck with any woman,
it'd be somebody like Shay, you know, Diamond.
Somebody womanly, not nobody manly, like Reba.
- Don't do that shit to me.
- If that's the case, I have a boyfriend, bitch.
- You know what?
Pooch, you must don't understand,
I'm the queen bee up in this bitch.
- Yeah, queen bedbug, you ugly bitch.
Now go ahead, before I call pest control on that ass.
Fuck outta here.
- I may be ugly, but my money make up for it though.
What's good?
- I told you what's good.
This drink.
- The only thing that you need to be worried
about right now,
the only thing you need to be doing,
is eating this fucking pussy later,
'cause I'll be damned if I work my ass off
for some ho to come up in here.
No, so that's the only thing
you need to be worried about
is where that mouth is gonna be later.
Right there. - Okay.
- Nah, get drunk.
You know what?
Maybe next time. - Maybe next never.
Diamond, can you get my stick
before I hacksaw Jim Duggans a nigga again?
- You hear that?
You and your friend both,
you're gonna come up missing
y'all keep fucking with us.
It's in the back hall, Pooch.
You know I don't fucking like her.
- Okay cool, I get it.
We're gonna bounce anyways, alright,
but let me come by later, you know,
finish this talk we're having, alright?
- Ain't you the one that said
you don't need permission to come by?
- Yo, stop bringing up the fucking past, alright?
I was just showing out.
- Whatever, just give me a call later.
- Alright, but for real,
someone you need to call is the AC repairman,
'cause it's fucking hot in here, alright?
- Are you fucking kidding? - Okay Rebe, we out, we out!
Oh god, it's so fucking hot!
- You know what, maybe I should strap up
and bend your ass over, how about that?
- Nah, I'm good. - Yeah, I bet.
Fuck out of here, that's exactly how I feel about you
doing whatever the hell you think you about to do to me.
Fuck outta here, man.
Made me this fucking big ass drink, nothing I can do.
Thank you.
Diamond, kick they ass out!
- Yo Reba, hurry the fuck up, where are you, man?
- Woo-wee bro!
Yo, that didn't go too well.
- For real, what happened?
- What didn't happen, bro?
She's not feeling me, yo.
Told her ass to get drunk, bro.
Yo, matter of fact bro,
what about the bitch that got you in the dog house,
call her up, I know she got some friends.
- Oh shit, you fucking right.
You know what?
I'm callin' 'em up right now, and I know a couple of them
that know how to get down, you know how I feel?
- Yo, set that shit up bro. - Boy.
* Check, check
* One, two, one, two
* Yo, yo shorty said she wanted to feel me
* Shit got real, shorty said she wanted to rock with me
* Just keep the honey and I don't know want you gonna see
* Just last week she was kind of skimming me
- Wait.
Why your ass always gotta come to these hood ass stores?
- I keep telling you, all the hood stores
got all the good shit,
and I do not got time to be going online.
- Wow.
I'm gonna go in here and look at these clothes then.
- Hey T, ain't that that white bitch
that work at the hospital?
- Yeah, that's her.
- Shoot, them guys be falling all over her.
I don't know why, first she's a lesbian,
two, she ain't all that, pussy licking bitch.
She nasty as fuck, licking pussy, that's nasty.
Bitch lick pussy, ugh!
- Well you know, two out of three ain't bad.
That's right, I'm a lesbian and I lick pussy.
But you know what, the one thing you got wrong about me
is about me not being all that,
'cause trust me, I am,
and obviously I'm doing something right,
'cause the topic of your conversation is me,
and I don't even fucking know you, bitch.
- Just because hang with black people
don't give you a fucking pass,
'cause I'm about to beat your ass.
- I wish you would.
You go ahead and try, bitch!
- Whoa! - What?
You gonna do what?
- Hey yo, ma, you ain't had a sneak her like that.
- Man, you lucky,
'cause you had an opportunity to see it coming.
As far as I'm concerned, you can get little miss Barbie
and get her up out of here
before she get molly whopped.
- Yeah, Nicki No-naj edge up having bitch.
- What's good?
Girl, let's get out of here.
Crazy ass bitch, I'll smack the fuck
out of that bitch so she better not
come back outside!
What do you mean, I smacked the shit out of her.
- She ain't coming outside. - She gonna come,
I want her ass to.
- Damn, you alright babe?
- Yeah, it's not like she hit me that hard.
- Shit, I don't know girl,
she punched the shit out of you.
- It ain't like you helped.
- I'm gonna smack the fuck out of her,
you know I will.
And what the hell, who is Nicki No-naj?
Who is that?
That some true white girl shit, the hell wrong with you?
Jesus.
You okay?
- I'm fine, but for real Pooch,
all because I'm a lesbian,
I gotta be taking shit like that
from bitches I don't fucking know.
- Man, fuck that bitch,
she just mad 'cause she ain't your friend.
- But for real is this what you
wanna go through on the regular?
Like this, this what you wanna go through?
- I mean, just 'cause that happened
don't mean I don't feel how I feel.
I still feel the way I feel, you know?
I just wanna make sure it's right.
- You know what?
I be seeing how you look at Shay,
and she think you playing
but I know for real that you dead ass,
so what's going on with that?
Are you serious, Sherita?
Like, what makes you think that's gonna go anywhere?
For one, she likes dick, and she has a man.
- Okay, I know, I know.
But like okay, can I be honest with you?
We been friends for like ever.
- Forever, yes. - And you know I like her,
but I'm in love with her, like I really, really like her.
I just, don't know what to do, okay?
- What to do?
How about no, don't do shit.
She likes dick!
And she has a man!
- And that's why I keep my distance,
I let her do her, you know what I'm saying, you know?
But she really is the only girl I think about.
- For real?
- And the only girl I think about like that.
Like that girl, Jesus Christ,
like I literally think about her
when I'm in bed with Top Cat.
- Shut up, really?
- Yes, bitch, this girl serious.
- So, do you like masturbate to her?
- Yeah, bitch, I still do,
the fuck you talking about?
- Oh shit girl, you have it bad.
You might wanna take some advice.
I'm not sure, because I am staying out of this one.
- I got it bad, I know, Jesus Christ.
Don't judge me. - I don't.
I never saw someone hit the floor so fucking hard,
wait till we tell Shay, I swear.
I never seen someone hit the floor so hard.
- Alright, I heard y'all bitches from the driveway,
what y'all doing here?
(girls laughing)
- Hey. - We're here now,
how you doing?
- I'm fine, I'm fine, where we going, where we going?
- Oh my god.
- Sherita, stop looking at my ass,
I expect that shit from Diamond,
but bitch, you tripping.
- Mm, shit.
What the fuck up with this Sherita shit today?
Like the fuck?
- Girl, come on, I did not come over
for us to stay all day in your damn house, let's go.
Let's go do something.
I mean look at you looking all sexy and shit.
- How do you y'all know I ain't have nothing planned?
- 'Cause everybody know-
- [Both] You ain't no plan-able bitch.
- Let's go.
(laughing)
But you know what, I wanna go change,
'cause I definitely don't wanna go in this,
and after she looking like that, like damn.
- She is looking nice.
- Yeah, we should go change.
- Y'all okay. - Yeah.
(upbeat music)
* Here we go
* Yo, yo
* No lyrics, just a party
* Here we go
* No lyrics, just a party
* Here we go
* No lyrics, just a party
* Here we go
(girls laughing)
- Jesus Christ.
Hold on y'all, wait, wait,
let me fix my wig real quick.
I'm good?
- Yeah, it's good. - Okay, good, let's go.
- Wait, wait, wait.
Why we always gotta go to the club
when there's like nobody's in here, like it's dead?
- [Poochie] Damn, why people gotta be in here
for us to have fun?
- 'Cause I wanna dance-
- I mean, we could do that without, damn.
Well, that means I can have like two more drinks then,
I'm not being responsible tonight, I'm drinking.
(Shay speaking indistinctly)
- I saw that.
- Can she not go in there without me looking?
- Yeah, no, yeah.
- Just for that, I'm going to get us drinks.
- [Diamond] Yeah.
- Hey miss lady, name's Kevin.
What's you name?
- I don't give a fuck, get the fuck out of my face.
- Yo, fuck you bitch.
- Little dick ass nigga.
- Hold up, hold up.
Not another one, what you want?
- My name E, man, what's your name?
- Taken.
(man chuckling)
- Sense of humor, I like that.
- Well trust me, I'm not being humorous.
- Really, who you you here with?
(Shay sighing)
- Me.
- Oh shit, I like a challenge.
- How about you go challenge somebody else
and get away from mine?
- Oh, it's like that? - Ooh.
- It's like that. - Okay, I see what it is.
- [Both] Goodbye.
- You think you slick.
Normally I'd slap the shit out you
for doing some shit like that, but thanks,
'cause he was annoying me as soon as he walked up.
- What's friends for, you know?
- Gay ass friends. - Yeah, a'ight.
- I really think you trying
to get in my panties though,
especially after that shit you said the other day,
I can't believe you like pussy now.
- Let's just go enjoy the party, sheesh.
- [Shay] You still gay.
- [Man] Hope you don't think I'm stalking you again.
- Oh my god, why the fuck are you talking to me?
Why does it seem that no matter where I go,
you always seem to be around?
First it's the gym. - Which is Public.
- And then it's my complex.
- I just moved in down the street.
- And now here.
- A very good friend of mine
actually is throwing this party.
- Oh, I do not even know whose party this is.
- Hold up, is she talking to a man?
- Ooh, that's the nigga from the gym.
- And she talking 'bout she don't like dick.
- Hmm, I know she tired of that fucking bag.
- Get her ass, get her.
- I'm just here with a few friends of mine,
and uh, oh look, here they come now.
- Well, well, well, what do we have here?
- Ooh, you tell him.
- No, it's nothing, trust me,
I was about ready to leave.
- Oh bitch, you so damn rude!
- Rude?
- Hi, I'm Shay, this is Poochie.
- Sherita.
- Oh, it's Sherita now?
- Yes. - Whatever the fuck she is.
- And you are?
- I'm Jersey, it's nice to meet you both.
- Hey, okay, okay.
How do you know Diamond?
- I actually don't.
- Try to keep it that way, can we please?
- I'm trying to change it tonight.
I see her at the gym a lot.
- Oh, the gym. A lot. Oh.
While he's working out, all sweaty.
So- - He's a cutie.
- So a good looking man
interested in my lesbian friend.
- Wow, so direct.
- You do know she lesbian, right?
I mean, we've been trying to get her some dick for years.
- Girl! - Forever.
Literally forever.
- I mean, you got your hands full, buddy so.
- Cobwebs up that pussy. - Oh my-
- Well good luck, we gonna leave you two at it.
Come on Poochie, Sherita, whoever you are.
- Who said I wanted to be left her?
- I mean, the dick pricked his pants and shit so.
- You so nasty, oh my god, just,
you'll have to excuse them,
they are just known for running away men.
- Well, I run bitches away too.
(chuckling)
Watching you.
- Oh my God.
I can't-
- You have some very interesting friends.
- Yeah, I do, don't I?
- Look, I'm not running nowhere,
hell, I'm surprised that you got this much
to say to me right now.
- Well, don't get used to it.
I ain't trying to look all rude and shit
at someone else's party,
so don't make it worse than it is, okay?
- Guess I better take advantage
of this moment then right now.
Can I at least get you a drink?
- That's fine, I don't see no harm in that,
but don't think it's gonna go any further, okay?
I mean, you a good looking man and shit,
but like my friend said, I like women.
- Looks like we have something in common,
I like women too.
- So, Jersey, what's your story?
Are you divorced, single, married, girlfriend?
You a liar, player, wait, wannabe player?
Mm-hm.
Are you gay, wait no, you can't be gay,
'cause you always hitting on me so you can't be gay.
What about bi?
You a wife beater, is that what it is?
- None of the above.
- So what's your story?
- I'm just a single man on a mission.
- And what's your mission?
- You.
- What the fuck did I just say?
- I heard what you said. - Obviously not.
- I'm just a little hard-headed.
I just wanna get to know you.
Take you out a few times,
and try my hardest to keep a beautiful smile on that face.
Is that too much to ask for?
- Yeah, yeah it is.
I mean, see, this is why I can't fucking be nice.
What about the simple fact that I like women?
And you know what, and I have a girlfriend,
who I am very dearly into.
- That's some temporary shit.
It's time to get into some permanent shit.
- Oh, temporary.
So you think you're the man to turn me on, huh?
How about this, I've been in this permanent shit
for this many years now, okay?
Yeah. - This many years?
- That many years now.
- That's the plan.
- So you got a plan, huh?
- Look Diamond, I'm not afraid of who you are,
and I'm definitely not afraid of your girlfriends,
the little one, and the two that just left.
I tell you what, I give you a little time to think about it.
Hopefully I see you at the gym again.
You have a good night.
* You like what I say
* Tizzay, tizzay, tizzay
* Now let me tell you about top
* Ain't nothing wrong with a man known what he wants so I
* Yeah
* I'm kind of picky when it comes to mine
* You got your lions and tigers and bears oh my
- So, you do know he gonna fuck the brakes off you, right?
- Ain't nobody gonna be fucking nothing.
- Shit, if she had brakes.
You going zero to 100 real quick, ain't you Diamond?
- This why I can't take y'all asses out.
- She want some big dick, don't you?
- Oh my god. (Shay laughing)
- Aw.
- Aw, shit.
- What?
- This nigga blowing me up.
Y'all ready to go?
- Yeah, Stacey's gonna be calling me anyways.
- Y'all some fucking party poopers, ugh.
Let's go. - Says her.
- She'll talk to you later! - No the fuck I won't.
- Yes, you will. - You will.
(laughing)
- Ooh-hoo-hoo. (laughing)
(phone vibrating)
Hello?
- Hey, what's up?
Yo, can I come in, and we can finish
this fucking chat we had earlier?
- I'll think about it.
- Did she fucking hang up on me?
Baby?
- [Diamond] I'm still thinking.
- Well, can you think the fuck faster,
'cause it's fucking cold out here.
- Why don't you go call your other bitch?
- What other bitch?
- Your lipstick bitch.
- Babe, are you drunk right now?
- Yeah, why? You not?
'Cause I can't be around no sober nagging ass bitch,
so that means I'm gonna be in here trying to sleep,
and you're gonna be in here
talking my motherfucking ear off,
and I just can't get jiggy with that shit right now.
Yo, why your ass not in this house?
- Because you got me waiting out here
like a fucking idiot.
- I told your ass a long time ago,
the door was open, I told you I was drunk too,
why do I have to be so damn specific with you?
Oh well.
(dog barking)
- Babe, can we just go to bed right now, please?
Can we just go?
- Yeah, I'm going to bed,
'cause you know what, I ain't fighting with you today,
I don't feel like kicking ass today, but you know what?
You best believe I ain't gonna forget
about this tomorrow, okay?
- Alright, tomorrow right?
As in ass-kicking time, right?
- I could do that shit right now if you want.
- No, tomorrow's fine, alright?
Tomorrow's fine, come on. - Still mad at you.
You look funny when I'm drunk, just so you know.
(gentle music)
* Ooh baby
* I never meant to hurt you
* Neglect your feelings
* Or even desert you
* Ooh
* You came in and saw me with that other girl
* I swear it changed my whole world
* Can you please give me one more chance
* I swear we can make it last
* Ooh yeah
* Racing down the freeway moving closer
* 'Cause I need to get to you
* You
* I'm so sorry for a change
* Don't leave me
* Ooh
(knocking)
(Poochie groaning)
- The fuck you want?
I got a hangover.
- Hey yo, Pooch,
I been crying all night, man.
I know I fucked up man, I know that shit was foul.
I'm sorry, yo.
- You fucked up?
Yeah, that's an understatement.
See, if you done played your cards right,
I'd of fucked her with you,
but you had to be a player
and get caught out there with your crybaby ass.
- I'm saying, you know things
ain't been the same between us, man,
and I'm a man,
I got needs, sexual needs.
You ain't been doing that.
- Top Cat, my head is spinning right now,
and this is making you look like a complete turn-off.
I'm ready to throw up in your face
like five times, and send you on your merry ass way.
- I'm saying Poochie, can I please come in?
- No, no.
Do you know how you made me feel?
And to think, I knew about this shit the whole fucking time,
and you was lying straight up to my face?
* Straight up to my face
- I know.
I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry.
I'm not sorry.
And you helped make my decision much easier.
- Fuck you talking about?
- You're the last nigga I would ever fuck with, I think.
It's about time I give women a try now.
- Hold on, you got me lost and confused, like I don't-
- Just like you was when you was in this pussy,
you could never find your way.
You know what, maybe it's the hangover talking
or me being snappy, but your dick was wack as fuck,
like I used to fucking fake it,
just so you could fucking hurry up.
- I'm saying, but you wasn't saying that
when I was shooting you in the air,
dropping you on my face and doing all this shit!
- Aw, did I hurt your feelings?
That's how I felt when you was eating shorty's shit
right in front of me.
How you gonna eat some shit
that's gonna get up and walk away from you?
Fucking stupid.
- You did.
- Yeah, um, but I came back.
You let shorty bust up in your face
and kick you out at the same time.
* Bust in your face, kick you out, at the same damn time
Get the fuck out my face, Top Cat.
- [Top Cat] Hey yo Sherita,
I ain't letting you go that easy, girl!
I know I fucked up, but we's married!
- Not for long, nigga,
and I got a new man too,
and he's gonna help me get your shit out if you don't mind.
Less work for you, right?
Get the fuck away from my door Top Cat,
I got to fucking work.
- [Top Cat] Yo, well that shit ain't gonna last,
as long as I'm alive!
- Well you might as well die nigga, 'cause it's over.
* Ooh
(soft music)
- I am starving, I can't wait to eat something.
Oh girl. - Eat anything?
Even a dick?
- Stupid ass.
- What'd you do to her?
- That's the one that Poochie
knocked the fuck out at the store.
- Oh, she ain't got no black eye though.
- Hi, babies!
I am hungry.
Who's buying my breakfast?
- What the fuck?
- And why the hell should we buy you breakfast?
Ain't that supposed to be the other way around?
- Why not?
To give power, the women's liberation.
Where's the problem?
- Goddamn, fuck, shit, cool D motherfucker.
- Jeeze. - Sorry.
- What the hell
is going here?
- I'm sorry, (laughing) we got Tourette's,
so sometimes ugly ass bitch,
super frog, little dick. - Whoa.
- I'm so sorry.
- You are crazy woman, okay?
Now, I'm going.
- Bye, see ya later. - Danger!
- Chalkboard, Moby Dick, Barbara Streisand!
(girls laughing)
You said super frog, little dick.
(laughing)
- Why Barbra Streisand come into it? (laughing)
- I don't know, it's what popped up in my head.
You so stupid.
- It was your idea.
Ain't that the guys from the club?
- What guy?
- Yeah, the one that had your pussy wet,
what's his name, what's his name, what's his name?
Jersey.
- Girl, you better not.
- I'm not, but I'm gonna.
- No, Shay, don't you dare,
I swear to God, if you do I'm gonna act up.
- Then act the fuck up, I'm still gonna.
- Shay, Shay.
(Shay laughing)
Jesus, stop it, oh my God.
(suspenseful music)
Oh, Jesus.
- Hey baby. - Hey.
- Where's Shay?
- Over there, with them two, being ignorant.
- Yes, yes. - Hello, you two men.
(dramatic music)
- Oh damn, hello!
(dramatic music)
I'll kill your boyfriend if you can't get away from him.
- Oh, shit bitch,
ain't this the one that had you soaked the other night?
- Nobody had me soaked the other night.
- Mm-hm. - Please.
(Poochie laughing)
But I must say, he is fine though.
- Did you just compliment a man?
- Shut up.
(Poochie laughing)
That's as far as it's gonna get.
- Mm-hm.
Who he with though?
- Oh, he's with a guy from the gym
that he works out with.
- Oh, so you do pay attention?
- Aren't you- - Yeah nigga, that's me.
Bring your asses, we over here, let's go.
- Man.
Damn nigga, where you find her at?
- I didn't, that's Diamond's friend,
I met her at the party last night.
- He so stupid, oh my god, it's not even-
- Hey. - Hey.
What's up baby, how are you?
- Chilling, chilling, chilling.
- So what did you say to them?
- I didn't say nothing. - I know you did.
- I just told them to come sit down, so be nice.
- I can't no more.
- And where the fuck was I?
- Probably in the bathroom jerking off or something,
I don't know, let's go.
- Hold on, hold on, yo, my breath stank?
- When we get over there don't say shit.
Not a damn word, and you'll be fine.
(guy laughing)
- Fuck you nigga.
I wasn't gonna say nothing,
but your shit ain't right either.
I'm gonna invent your ass a peppermint donut
to eat in the morning.
Yo, hook me up with her friend, though.
- Hook you up?
You need to hook up that edge up first,
you slippin', let's go.
- Yeah, a'ight.
(upbeat music)
- That's some fucked up shit
that happened the other day.
I'm you glad you alright though my nigga, you feel me?
(record scratching)
- Goddamn.
- Ain't this the, oh, she said next...
- [Shay] That nigga had her pants wet.
- That's not- (groaning)
- You wet yet? - Shut up.
- Ain't that the bitch I just punched in the fucking face?
- That is her, that's who I was telling you who that was.
- I wish I could punch her ass again.
- Y'all don't know how to behave when I'm not around.
- We don't know how to behave? - Good morning ladies.
- Hey, the wonder twins, what's up Jeremy?
- Jersey. - Yeah, whatever, anyway,
so, who's your friend?
- Hello, I'm Dave, and you are?
- I'm Poochie.
- I thought it was Sherita.
- We being technical today?
My name is Poochie. Anyway.
(chuckling)
- Good morning, beautiful.
- Are we really finna do this right now?
- Absolutely.
- Why y'all still standing?
Have a fucking seat.
- Take a load off.
- [Shay] Date time.
(dramatic music)
- So, what are we doing later?
- What are we doing later?
- No, what are we doing later? - Right, we, we, we.
Um, excuse me, where you going?
I'll be right back.
- Is she okay?
- Uh-uh, bitch. - Mm-mm, excuse me.
- We'll be back, stay right here y'all, I'm sorry.
- You go ahead, I can't see.
Wait, here, here.
- What you doing?
- Girl, I'm white, I'm paranoid as hell.
Take down the plate and model number of that car,
'cause I'm telling you right now, if she don't call us,
whoever that is is gonna be
in a lotta goddamn trouble with us.
- This is why I love your ass,
'cause you're totally fucking ready.
I'm gonna write this shit down.
- Can you see? - Okay, right there, yeah.
- J-A....
What the fuck?
The fuck?
Oh hell no.
- Call her, call her right now.
- You already know I'm about to call her ass.
Um, excuse me, what the fuck was that?
- Yo, that Sherita?
- You mean Poochie? - Damn girl.
- Oh, that's her name?
- Sorry, y'all. - Sorry about that.
(laughing)
- Excuse me.
I don't even know what to think
with that right now, honestly.
- Who was that in that car?
- I've never even seen that car before.
- Yo, is everything okay?
- I hope so. - I hope so.
I hope so, it's ridiculous.
(dramatic music)
- Serious like- - I swear.
- She had-
- And then I gotta deal with this nigga, on top of it.
- Yo, tell me this,
which one of these niggas you fucking?
- Top Cat, don't come up in here
with all that bullshit,
first of all you the one acting out
all the goddamn time.
- Diamond, shut your gay ass the fuck up, man.
Don't you got some pussy to lick somewhere or something man?
- Yo my man, you alright?
I'm trying to enjoy my morning here.
- Yo man, I see how quick you jumped up
in her motherfucking defense
so I know it ain't you man.
Yo man, what about you homie,
you fucking my wife, man?
- No, but I would if she let me.
I can clearly see you're not.
- Top Cat, what you're not about to do
is come in this fricking public place and disrespect me.
I don't even know why you here,
you're not even built for that.
- Oh, you didn't know?
This nigga's the black hulk, roar for 'em.
(Jersey roaring)
- What the fuck nigga?
- You keep your keep your hands off women, too,
or you're gonna see me turn.
- You got bodyguards now, nigga?
- Mm-hm.
Yep.
- Okay.
Alight Sherita.
- Alright, Sherita.
Fuck outta here, fucking bum ass nigga, yo.
Stupid.
- Yo, so what's up with your white friend over there?
- Jersey got her soaking again.
- Him? That nigga? - That nigga.
- Get the fuck outta here.
- I'm sitting right here, like I can hear you.
I'm right here.
- Let's go girl, I gotta go to work. (laughing)
Nice meeting y'all.
- I just got here.
- Diamond, wait a minute, wait a minute.
Can I call you later?
- No.
You know what, no.
Actually, no, you know what,
'cause I don't even like you.
I don't even like you like that, no, I don't.
- Girl, if you don't give him your number right now.
- Go, go, let's just go.
- Give him the number, he's not scary.
- That's crazy, huh? - What?
Yo, okay, give me the scoop,
what the hell happened at the party last night?
- Yo, we finally had a real conversation,
and I think I made a breakthrough.
- Damn, from the sounds of things,
you really might have a chance with shorty.
- Yo, I really like her bro, I dig her.
- And her being white don't bother you?
- Do I look like I discriminate to you?
- A little bit.
I'm must say though it's common for the big black
built dudes to get with the dope white girl,
but her friend bad as hell too.
- As you can see, one ran up out of here
like her ass was on fire,
and the other one still got man problems,
so it looks like your ass out today, buddy.
But we can hit the gym so you can work
some of that shit off.
Let's go man.
- Who the fuck was them dudes I seen you talking to?
- What was you doing, following me?
I do got a life outside of you, Rello.
- Bitch, I asked you a question.
- Them Diamond's friends,
she was scared to talk to the nigga
so I just went and got them for her,
that's all it was, Rello.
- I'mma need you to call into work today.
- I'm not doing that, you don't pay none of my bills.
As a matter of fact, we need to take a break,
'cause all you wanna do is put your hands on me
and I'm not feeling that shit.
(gun cocks)
- Bitch, you must be ready to die.
(suspenseful music)
Now let's try this again.
I'm going to need you to call into work today.
I wanna fuck.
- Yo, Rello, you really buggin' right now.
- And didn't I ask you to bring another bitch home,
like where is she at?
Better yet, what's up with one of your friends?
- You fucking kidding me?
Let me out of this car.
- Bitch,
if I can't have you,
what makes you think I'mma let the next nigga have you?
We in this shit for life.
- Rello, what part of I don't want you don't you get?
- You know what, better yet,
how 'bout I take you back to where I just picked you up from
and then we can question the niggas myself?
- Yo, just let me out this car, like right here.
- That's my girl.
(dramatic music)
- [Shay] Stop, stop!
- [Woman] Too often, it's so sadly,
most of us wanna be loved so badly
that we're willing to sacrifice our soul
for a distorted perception of what makes us happy.
I learned, as a woman, I should never be mad
at a man for the way he chooses to act.
I need to reevaluate myself
and what it is that I lack
that I allow that man to treat me like that.
In return, most people think I make decisions
based upon pride,
I just know if I deserve more than you're able to provide
I could put those feelings aside
and keep it moving like you're not alive,
see you be like that sometimes.
So many of us are quick to settle for the average,
that said, if the only climax you bring is on a mattress,
then me and you should never be established.
- This bitch got me out here losing my motherfucking mind,
user located this shit?
If she with another nigga, I swear to motherfucking god,
she better not!
Oh, motherfucking jackpot bitch, I got your ass, bitch!
* Uh-Huh
* Form dealing with an ex to running up a check
* She knew rep the gang that's tatted on my neck
- Bitch, I got your ass.
* That's how winners move
* And all these bitches on me, but I'm into you
* Yo, she's stunting on the ex
* I let her (indistinct)
* She looking for revenge, ain't nobody safe
- Mm-hmm.
I got your ass, bitch.
* Pull a pistol out my waist and almost bought a case
* But if you get to flexing then I'm running down
* I'm not sorry
- So, what made you think about me today?
- Come on now, I think about you all the time.
- Really? - I'm for real man, come on.
I wouldn't be here if it wasn't like that.
- Mm-hm.
(Poochie laughing)
You lucky, you would've went for my lips,
I would've punched you in your face.
- Yo, I knew you was a fucking ho ass bitch
when I met you, yo.
- Who the fuck is this Al Roker
looking motherfucker, B?
- Nigga, I'm her motherfucking husband,
I swear to fuck I am nigga!
- Soon to be ex-husband, nigga.
- That's my word B, you need to back the fuck up.
Yo, my nigga, what the fuck's wrong with you, man?
- What the hell is you doing?
You know what, this what we gonna do right now, okay?
Keith, if you win, give me a call,
and Top Cat, if you win,
I still need you to sign the papers,
and still kill yourself.
I can't deal with this shit, I'm out.
- So what you gonna do nigga, shoot me?
Know what I mean, throw me in a koi pond?
What, you want me to sleep with the fishes, nigga?
Over her, nigga?
Man, put that shit the fuck away
before we both go to jail out here, man.
- Know what, you right my nigga.
Thanks for fucking up my night.
- Nigga, fuck you nigga.
- Your wife was gonna do that shit.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, so this that nigga
from the other night, right?
That you said wasn't no-motherfucking-body?
Fuck you, Sherita!
(indistinct)
- Shit, fuck you nigga, I do what the fuck I wanna do!
Fucking asshole, you a fucking piece of shit, fuck you!
Fucking asshole, fucking shit.
(phone ringing)
- Hello?
- [Poochie] Hey girl, you got company right now?
- No, why? What's wrong?
- [Poochie] Bitch, open the fucking door yo,
I got some shit to tell you.
Bitch. - Well, hi to you too.
These two niggas is fucking crazy, crazy.
- Who are you talking about?
Jersey and Dave?
- No.
Top Cat, and this new guy I met.
- A new guy?
Wait a minute, you met somebody and you didn't tell me?
Okay.
Wait a minute, so what happened?
No, go on, go on.
- Okay, so first of all,
I've actually been talking to this guy
for a couple of weeks now, you know,
being the fact that Top Cat's
no longer a factor in my life.
- Girl, fuck Top Cat, we don't care.
- Anyway, so he asked me to meet up with him,
I go to meet up with him, everything cool.
This nigga pops up outta nowhere.
- Who, who?
- Top Cat, cussing me out,
calling me all types of bitches,
all types of hos, next thing you know,
my friend pulls a gun out on him.
A fucking gun, bitch. - Shut the fuck up.
- Pulled a whole fucking gun.
I'm like what the fuck is you doing?
- I need a drink right now,
just the thought of it, I need a drink right now.
- Yeah, we do need to drink, I could use one.
- Why don't you call Shay and let's see
if she wanna meet us up, and-
- We can go get a drink.
- And you know what,
Stacey's out of town,
so I don't need to worry
about nobody nagging my fucking ass off.
- Let's go get a drink bitch, I need one.
We got to go, this some bullshit.
(laughing)
Oh my God.
- [Diamond] Somebody not say nothing to me.
- [Poochie] I'm sorry.
(upbeat music)
- I am so glad we changed before we came,
because honestly I was not feeling that outfit.
- Well, I was feeling my outfit.
- [Diamond] Me too, make your ass look nice and slim.
- I know you ain't talking, boo boo. (laughing)
Let's go get something to eat, I'm hungry.
We gotta go get Shay in a minute anyway.
- [Diamond] I'm starving.
(Poochie sighing)
- Woo, I am hungry. - Starving.
(laughing)
Can't wait to get something to eat.
- Yes, oh my gosh.
- Poochie,
this bitch told me she was gonna be out of fucking town.
Is that her car right there?
- Mm-hm, so should we go see
what type of town this is, though?
Matter of fact, I got one better for you.
Let me change my motherfucking heels,
and put on my sneakers,
because you know I'mma beat a bitch ass in a minute.
And you know, I am with this shit, I don't play no games,
about my mother fucking friends, I will beat a bitch ass,
let's go, come on.
- You know what, you know what?
- Yeah, don't play no games, you see this right?
Let's go. - You know what?
Hold on a second. - What?
- Hold on. - I got my shorts on.
I got my shorts on, I'm ready.
- No, no, we're gonna do it my way.
Bitch wanna be like friends all the time,
bumping into friends.
Let's see how she like bumping into friends.
- You sure? - Yeah, we gonna do it my way.
- You know- - You know, like, oh my god.
- Let's get her, bitch, yeah.
(upbeat music)
- What about y'all, you single?
- Yeah, no, I'm fine by the way.
What about you, you single?
- Yeah, I'm single, I been single for a while now.
- Oh my god, Stacey?
Is that you?
(crickets chirping)
Wow, Reba, haven't seen you forever,
like how long's it been, it's been years, right?
Come on Stacey, stand up.
Give me a hug, don't be rude.
- Um...
Um, excuse me, who the fuck is this?
- Sit your ass down.
- I'm sorry, I'm Diamond,
Stacey's girlfriend.
Well, ex-girlfriend now.
- And I'm her bodyguard.
Stacey, what town is this?
And Reba, get your bitch before I do something to her.
- Bitch, who the fuck are you calling a bitch?
- Listen, y'all want no parts of that.
- Yo what the fuck? - Sit down, sit down.
You don't want no part of that.
- Oh, oh, oh, oh.
- [Reba] Damn.
- It's okay honey, I ain't mad at you.
But I'm still the fucking baddest bitch you've ever had.
Come on Pooch, we out!
- Fuck bitches.
(chuckling)
- What the fuck was that, I thought you were single?
- Well, I am now.
(laughing)
- Now? - You are now.
- But you said you was single before!
- Listen, I had no part of that.
- Y'all got us out here looking stupid, yo.
- You know what?
I knew she was cheating the whole time.
- I could go back and beat bitch's ass,
you know I'm with the shit.
- No, I needed to see that,
I mean I knew she was cheating,
but I guess seeing it with my own eyes,
I just, I needed that.
- You have a girlfriend?
- I didn't know she was gonna be here.
- You have a girlfriend, are you serious?
- [Woman] That's fucking crazy,
y'all gonna let these bitches come up inside here
and disrespect us, you didn't even say nothing.
- I don't have no problem.
- You were just gonna let these bitches
come up to our date and fuck up our date
and disrespect us, and y'all not gonna say nothing?
What kind of shit is this? - Me and you are good!
- Are you fucking kidding me?
- I can go back. - That's not their fault,
they don't know us.
They don't know her life.
- I wasn't talking about them,
I was talking about Stacey and Reba.
- No, let's not even do that.
I don't even care.
You know what, I'm good.
- You sure?
- Let's go to Shay's house, please.
- Alright fine, let's go to Shay's house then.
You know what and don't even call her.
You know what, let's just go now.
She better not be on no dick.
Oh my god, we're gonna fucking cock block from the couch.
- Maybe we'll actually see this guy,
the one she been hiding forever on us.
- I might beat him up.
- Don't do that.
(Poochie laughing)
- [Poochie] She's mine!
- No, come on girl, let's go,
this is not worth it.
- Time out though, wait a minute,
so you just gonna leave me after I saved you
from getting your ass whooped?
- [Woman] Are you fucking kidding me?
(dramatic music)
- Girl, I definitely need this today.
I cannot wait, what?
Why is everything all red?
- I don't know, but if she on some dick,
She about to be mad, 'cause I'm cock blocking bitch.
(both laughing)
- [Both] Shay!
- [Diamond] Shay, Shay?
- [Poochie] Shay, come out here, the hell,
it's dark as hell.
What you doing, playing hide and go seek nigga?
- We gonna get drunk. - The fuck.
- Oh my god, Shay!
- What the fuck?
- Why you come to my house without calling?
- Call? Are you kidding?
- Yo, what the fuck happened?
Talk now, like start talking now.
- Damn man, forget all that,
after this, let me know y'all was coming,
I would've cleaned up a little bit.
- Cleaned up, yo.
- What the fuck happened,
- This who came and got you this morning?
Word to me, you better start talking!
I can't believe you yo, like what?
- It's cool, we cool, couples fight, you know?
- Couples fight? - Not like this.
This shit is not normal, this is dangerous shit.
- I ain't never did not shit like this to you.
Listen, remember all those times
that I used to question the stuff that I would say to you?
I meant it, like Shay, I'm in love you,
like and I've been for a long time, but right now,
I'mma need you to get up out of here.
Like you gotta come with me,
you can come with her,
she got, you know, she's single now,
you can come to her crib, we can get you a hotel room,
anything, just let me know.
You gotta get out of here.
- I'm sorry, I didn't tell y'all
'cause I didn't know what he was gonna do if I did.
(sobbing)
- To who?
Probably need to get this nigga over here.
Call that nigga, where he at?
(door banging)
(dramatic music)
- You guys gotta go, you guys gotta go,
you gotta go, please, please, please.
- Pooch, Pooch, Pooch, no, Pooch.
- Yo, who the fuck you got in my house?
- Just go, just go, just go. - Poochie.
- You lying motherfucker.
You said you was single.
You was fucking with my best friend the whole time?
- What are you talking about?
- What the fuck are you doing?
- Fuck all that, what does she mean,
fucking her the whole time?
- Keith?
- Keith.
- Oh hell no.
Nah, you motherfucker.
- Who the fuck is Keith?
- Oh my god, Pooch, no, Poochie!
Are you crazy? - Pooch stop, no, stop.
Put it away, let's go. - Just go.
- Let's just go.
- I should kill you right where you stand.
- Let's just go no, don't do it, Pooch, let's just go,
- This bitch is crazy, man.
- Bitch is crazy, what, who's Keith?
- I told you from the gate that I got a woman,
like what are you doing,
like you really a stalker, like wow.
- So you being two niggas at once now, Keith and Rello?
- Pooch, let's go.
- What's up with you?
This shit is fucked.
- Shay, let's go.
- Just get out.
(dramatic music)
- What?
- Get out, just get out.
- Bitch, are you crazy?
- Yes, I am.
- You heard what the fuck she said.
Get the fuck out the door.
(dramatic music)
(gun firing)
- Oh my god, are you crazy?
Pooch, let's go, let's just go.
- Mother fucker, what you gonna do with that shit?
- Pooch let's go.
- You know I bust my gun too, nigga.
- Just go. - Go, come on, let's go.
- You know what, I better not catch your ass
in these motherfucking streets again.
If I catch you, I'mma kill your ass on sight.
I don't play about my fucking friends.
Shay, you know where to call me.
- Just go, please.
- Shay.
- This what the fuck I be talking about.
- Just get out-
- You're the fucking pussy bitch,
make sure you remember that too!
- Bitch, get out of here with your little peashooter.
Fuck is you talking about?
- Shay. - That bitch is lying Shay.
- Just come with us, please.
- Just get out. Just get out, just get out!
Just go.
- Oh yeah?
And what if he does that again to you, then what?
- I'm a grown ass woman Diamond,
I can take care of myself, just go.
- Yeah, I can see you can, can't I?
- That bitch is lying, like I mean like,
I don't even know these bitches.
Hey, like come on, like for real.
- Don't fucking touch me. - Bitch is lying.
Like I'm wouldn't even do you like that.
(dramatic music)
- That's one thing she not gonna do,
is lie to me about your ass.
Stupid motherfucker.
- I can't believe this girl, yo,
she really kicked us out for this bum ass nigga, yo.
And after everything I said to her,
tell this girl I love her,
she know we care about her,
she really gonna do that?
And he putting his fucking hands on her,
I wanna kill this nigga, word to me I can't believe it.
(knocking)
Hold on real quick, somebody at my door.
- I'm sorry, but my phone died.
Can I spend the night with you?
- Diamond, it's Shay right here. Let me call you back.
Of course you can, woman.
Come on.
What you got the coat on your head for?
(muttering)
I'm sorry about, what was his name again?
- Rello, bitch.
- The fucking dude told me his name was Keith.
Fucking clown.
- Whoever.
- You know I would never do this to you, right?
- Mm-hm.
(thunder booming)
(gentle music)
* Ooh
* Ooh babe
- You sure you wanna do this?
- Get turned on by my best friend?
Hell yeah.
* 'Cause I know I can, I promise
* Don't knock it till you try it
* See I'm gonna take you places
* That you never been before
* I promise you sweet lady
* Don't knock it till you
* Don't knock it till you try it
* Let me do that for you babe
* 'Cause I know I can
* Don't knock it
* I promise
* Don't knock it, don't knock it, don't knock it
* Don't knock it till you try it
* Let me do that for you boo
* 'Cause I know I can, I promise
* How can you say you don't like it
* When you never, never had it baby
* No, no, no, no
* Taste it
* Don't knock it till you try it
* Let me do that for you babe
* 'Cause I know I can
* I promise
(sirens blaring)
* All grown up, 315 bitch, you know the set
* I told you once before, by the way, they call me Tizzat
* Come on, let's fuck, what are you fronting for
* Straight to the point, no questions
* Shorty in her own class and I am her profession
* Oh tell by your stare, I know what you're looking for
* And she don't really need no lessons
* She got it down pact, like bitch, I'm the bestest
* Too wild to be playing, what are you fronting for
- Yo, what the fuck you do to that girl?
- The hell you talking about?
- Look at her.
* Let's make it happen, take me to your front door
* You're so cold and that shit's so fly
* The way you like it, come on nigga, let's ride
* Come on nigga, let's ride
* Straight to the point, no questions
* Shorty in her own class, and I am her profession
* And she don't really need no lessons
* She got it down pact like, bitch, I'm the bestest
- This is a bit unusual.
New to me.
- You got a phone?
- I may be able to accommodate you with that.
- Just give me your phone.
- She want my phone now.
- I need a ride, you got me?
- Hell yeah.
- Okay. - Yes.
- Wait a minute.
You better not be mean to me, you better not hurt me,
and you better cater to every need.
You think you can handle that, Mr. Jersey?
- What about your girlfriend?
- I'm giving you what you want, right?
So take care of the situation,
I mean, unless you scared,
'cause if you scared I can stay single, I don't care.
- Nah, I got you.
- Okay then, well, I'm ready, let's go.
* What time it is, what time it is
* This shit serious, baby I'm hooked
* You wanna fuck me, let me show you what's good
- Well, I must say, you must be king dingaling up in here,
so don't fuck this up,
or she gonna be in here with me next.
She like dick now, brother.
- Not yet, but she will.
Let's go.
- What you about to do now?
We popping up on her again.
- No man, I don't know what the fuck's wrong with you.
- You're a sucker, yo.
- Shut the fuck up,
fucking tired of your ass.
- Yo, Diamond, let me talk to you for a second.
* Can I talk to you for a minute
- Yo, shut the fuck up.
- You cannot be fucking serious.
You know what, you need to get away from me,
because you know what, my new friend
would not appreciate you up in my face.
- Oh yeah, new friend?
What's her name?
(Diamond chuckling)
- You'll see.
- What's up babe?
Everything alight?
- It is now.
- What's good yo?
So what, you leaving me for a man now, huh?
You and King Kong, huh?
You like dick now, what's up?
- We 'bout ready to find out.
- Yo bro, let's go man.
Yo, fuck you anyway.
- I'm saying, you looking like something special.
You ready to straighten up?
I turn bitches out too, you ready to be a girl again?
- What the fuck is this?
- Nigga, I am a girl,
I just don't take dick.
Get the fuck out my face, bro.
- Yo, what the fuck you doing, man?
- Yo, call me if you change your mind.
Shit, shorty fine, I'm trying to get that.
Damn.
- Well?
- Nice.
- Thank you.
- I don't see any pictures of any females on the wall.
- Make sure you check the couch for some panties.
- Okay.
- I'm about to hop in the shower real quick,
so make yourself at home.
- Okay. - Alight.
* I'mma put my hands up against your face
* I'mma make your heart beat
* New emotions rise
* It's goin' be hard for you to breathe
* Girl I ain't goin' lie
* Having you for breakfast in the morning time
* 'Cause that body
* The way you make it twirl
(shower running)
* Work
* Work, work, work, come on and
* Work, work, your body
* I'mma tell your body
* I'll make you feel so right
* I'mma be, be, be, be up all night
* I'mma lick, lick streaks all across your side
* We're gonna do it restless till the morning time
* 'Cause that body
* The way you make it twirl
* Makes me wanna lick you, lick you girl
- Yes!
- I can't believe we just did this,
and the weird part about it is I actually like the shit.
(phone vibrating)
- Hello, what's up girl?
- Have you heard from Shay?
She not answering my phone calls.
- Shay is just fine.
- Hey girl, I'm sorry, my phone is dead.
- She still at your house?
Hold up, I see, get the fuck out of here, you guys did it.
(Poochie laughing)
- We did and it was everything.
- Girl, I told you, but you know what?
I got a little secret.
So, Jersey fucked the brakes off me girl, I swear he did.
- She still gay. (laughing)
- About time, bitch.
- And y'all better not be playing,
I swear to god Pooch, you better not be.
- I'll show it to your face we ain't playing.
- Okay, talk to you later, bye.
(upbeat music)
(suspenseful music)
(girls laughing)
- So this what it is, right?
You leave me in the crib like this,
and you out here with Mr. Clean and shit, man.
So this your new nigga, huh?
(Rello laughing)
- You wrong and fucked up.
- Yeah.
(laughing)
- You don't even have a clue, do you my man?
- Everybody laughing like this shit a joke.
I don't wanna splatter you over
the back of this wall or something bro.
- Whoa, whoa.
- You'll get your chance my man.
- Chill, chill. - Babe, babe, please.
- Take one step. - Please don't roar tonight,
no roaring.
There's no need to roar.
- We don't need the Hulk.
- No, Rello, this is not my new man.
- That would be mine.
- But this is my new woman.
- [Rello] Oh, fucking.
(suspenseful music)
- Aw, you almost had us boo,
now will you excuse yourself,
'cause this couple's night.
- That's cute.
So you got the peashooter,
the peashooter gonna protect you right?
- I guess so.
- Alright, that's cool.
I meant what I said.
- Bye shit for brains.
- Go away.
- Bye, struggle. - Don't bleed to death.
(tense music)
(suspenseful music)
- [Poochie] Girl, that food was a good as hell.
- Mm-hm. - Got me all full and shit.
- I'm about to burst.
- Yeah and you gay.
(chuckling)
(suspenseful music)
- Hmm, peashooter, huh?
Got your peashooter, nigga.
- [Shay] Poochie!
- Yo.
- Where's the shit I left here last time I was here?
- Didn't you take it back home?
- No.
- I don't know, but can you get the wine though?
Please? (Shay speaking indistinctly)
So you just not goin' get it though?
- You're lucky I want to drink.
- Yeah, of course.
We all wanna drink.
- [Shay] Bitch, you just saw ma come from back there.
- I'm sorry, you knew I was gonna wanna drink anyway.
We're some alcoholics, that's what we do, we drink.
- [Shay] Your momma. (Poochie chuckling)
(suspenseful music)
- Yeah, motherfucker.
(dramatic music)
- Pooch!
I don't see no wine back there.
What wine do you see?
- Bitch, I should fucking kill you.
(suspenseful music)
I hate doing, I don't even know
what the fuck to call this shit.
What the fuck you did in my face,
I should blow your fucking toe off.
Disloyal bitch now you're over here eating pussy and shit.
(dramatic music)
(gun firing) (Shay screaming)
- Keith, huh?
You thought shit was sweet.
I told you I was gonna kill your ass on sight.
- [Rello] Well do it then, bitch.
- Shay, come on.
- Pussy licking bitch! - Come here.
Come here!
- Shit. - Fucking dumb ass nigga.
- Fucking trout mouth ass bitch.
- What the fuck am I supposed to do with this shit?
- Fuck she gonna do with that shit?
- This nigga deserve everything he got coming from you.
(heartbeat thumping)
And if you don't finish this off now
you gonna be running for the rest of your life.
Shoot this nigga. - Fucking bitches.
(gun firing)
- What I do now, what I do now?
- You good.
- What do I do know?
I can't believe I just shot somebody.
- It's alright, it's alright.
Trust and believe, my gun legal.
(gun firing) Pussy.
Let's go, get the phone.
Fucking call the police.
- [Man] With a witness on an aggravated battery
with a handgun
and they believe this might be in retaliation.
(sirens blaring)
- Ladies, how y'all doing tonight?
Don't answer that, y'all just shot a motherfucker.
Y'all know who that was?
That motherfucker, what he tell you his name was?
- Rello.
Keith.
- That's what I figured.
His real name was Jerome.
He was wanted in six different states,
fucking with six different women.
Three of them missing and the other three won't testify.
I was trying to find this motherfucker myself.
This nigga was dangerous,
so y'all got off kind of lucky tonight.
I guess we done here, you know,
there's no need for me to hold y'all up.
You look colder than a motherfucker.
- [Poochie] Shaken up.
- Shaken up and all that shit, yeah.
- Is you even a real cop, nigga?
(man chuckling)
- A'ight, well if I have any more questions,
I'mma come holla at y'all.
A'ight?
- Thanks. - Peace out.
(upbeat music)
* I don't want someday, somehow
* Gotta get this feeling out
* Oh but I don't know how to tell you this
* I wish
* We'd kissed
* Then you'd forget
* 'Cause I don't know how to tell you
* That I'm in love with you
* Going 'round in circles, circles
* I want you to know I'm in love with you
* Down the freeway moving close that I need to get to you
* You
* I'm so sorry for a change
* Don't leave me
* Ooh
* Yo, yo, I don't know where we went wrong
* Replay
* This bitch played the same song
* Ooh-wee
* Niggas getting tired of that
* New year, same me, new track
* Huh, what, I heard it all before shorty
* Ain't no reason to get hype on this track shorty
* I keep it real clear just to get my point across
* You ain't shit I tell you quick bitch, fuck y'all
* And every time we talk you always put my money in it
* My money, my bitch and you ain't doing shit with it
* Huh, what, you still on replay
* Skip that
* I see the cab coming
* That's your ride, catch that
* Your boy still get it in
* That's how they notice me
* I tried to tell you once before
* That's how it's supposed to be
* Huh, what, and now you want me to go
* I been gone bitch, with the wind, with the flow
* Ain't no reason to talk about it now
* You see the figures
* Everything I do I make money, get it nigga
* So this is my way to tell yo ass keep it moving sugar
* Yeah, shorty fucking with the wrong nigga
* When you see me in the club
* Best believe I got my gun on me
* My shirt Gray Goose, my pants cranberry
* Little shorty love that drink
* So she sat near me
* Diamonds in my ear made my head bop chill
* Everyone I know gives me shout outs
* See me at the bar dog
* Feel like it's my house
* A matter of fact yeah, it is my house
* The female over there's all in my mouth
* Had her last week, that was last week
* This is this week
* Ooh I'm glad we speak
* Glad we meet, glad we sit
* And we talk about doing something ultimate
* You know how we do, know how we get
* And the weed and the drink got me feeling this shit
* Man I'm flyer than a motherfucker
* Shirt match shoes
* And can't a nigga in here match my cool
* When you see me in the club nigga
* I just want to get my club on
* I got a bottle, let me get me drink on
* I gotta rap with some smoke nigga
* Let me get my smoke on, this only happen when you're VIP