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[short heavy breathing]
You okay?
Why are you sitting out here?
What did you do?
god, Gavin.
Oh, God Gavin.
No, no! No, no, no!
[crying] No, no!
So, what do you think Gav?
Yeah, I'd totally live there.
So, you're gonna build this for us
when you're done with school?
No way.
Making big money?
No, sir.
Architects, we just design the buildings.
No manual labor for these hands.
These things are staying clean.
Okay.
Yeah, what's that?
That is a fireplace.
In the bathroom?
It's the master bathroom.
This is where someone's gonna spend
their most private and intimate moments.
So, who wouldn't want a crackling fire
while they're squeezing one out.
Okay, well, if you're gonna put one in there,
you gotta put one
Shoot, I'm sorry Trev.
What the hell, Gav, what?
Let me, um
Let me get some paper towels.
Come on, Gavin.
Did
did you do that on purpose?
What? Of course not Bro.
You hate it.
I don't hate this, man.
No, you hate it, you hate it...
Stop!
Just move, get away, just
Trev, it's just a drawing.
It's not just a drawing, Gav!
It's not just a drawing!
It's not just a drawing, Gav!
It's not just a drawing!
It's more
Gav, I'm I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Oh, my God.
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I
Gav?
Gavin, I'm sorry.
You packed?
Ok, good.
I want to get on the road in 20.
Uh-uh. Come on.
How is he, Mom?
Mom, please. How is he?
21 Stitches, Trevor.
21.
The police come and talk to him?
Yeah, well, he told them that he was jumped
by a couple of guys,
He lied? Why?
Because he loves you, Trev.
And he knew that you would
lose your scholarship.
Doesn't matter.
I'm not going to that place anyway.
Like hell, you're not.
You have one year left.
We have come too far
for you to turn back now.
Listen, this is going be good for you, okay?
30 days with Doctor...
Whoa, Mom, 30 days?
You said a week?
Well, I lied, too.
Baby...
this is it, okay?
You gotta face it.
This is your last shot.
I'm not always gonna be here
to bail you out.
You're strong.
You gotta confront it.
No more denial.
Can we get some food or something, mom?
I'm really hungry.
[♪ ]
Mom, we gotta go back.
They put egg on my sandwich.
We're already on the road
No, Mom, we gotta go back.
I can't just take it off.
Mom, it's egg.
I hate egg, I hate the smell.
-It's not -I'm not turning around
Mom, it's not that--
Mom, it's just back there!
Close the damn door!
Mom
It's
just back there.
I'm I'm sorry, I shouldn't
I shouldn't have done that.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry Mom, I shouldn't
[child making noises]
Hey, what's up, Bro?
You the man of the house?
Yeah?
My name is Trevor, what's yours?
-I'm Alton. -Alton?
You, uh, handshake or fist bump guy?
Good choice, good choice.
Is your dad home?
Yeah?
Uh, rest your shoes, please.
Oh, my apologies.
The bag?
Yeah, that's fine.
[doctor sighs]
Nice nice place you got here.
Thank you.
Like a modern take on, uh,
traditional farm house?
Transitional furniture.
Looks good.
Well, okay Mr. Show-Off [chuckles]
You know, you're mother did tell me
that you were an architecture student
Uh, you're not about that life.[laughs]
So, um, uh, here's the kitchen.
You can get anything you want out of the refrigerator
and anything in the cabinets, you can help yourself to it.
Except for that bottom-right cabinet.
That's where Cynthia keeps all of our snacks.
It's all healthy stuff.
I don't think you want that anyway.
Listen Doc.
Don't call me Doc,
call me Robert, alright?
At least while we're here at the house.
When we're in session, you can call me Doc.
Sure, uh, Robert, listen.
How much is this going to cost my mom?
Oh, Trevor.
Look, right now
you're well-being is the most important thing, yeah?
So, family, home, money, school,
all that stuff can wait.
The most important thing is you.
It's all about you right now and what's in here, okay?
Yeah, no, I totally get that.
I just, I don't feel right
about being a burden or more of a burden,
so
Well, you can rest easy knowing
that it's not going to cost your mother a thing.
How's that?
You're doing this pro bono?
Out of the kindness of your heart?
[scoffs] Mm-mm.
I said it's not going to cost her anything.
W-with what money?
I mean, google "“broke college student"”.
I'm right there, first result.
I don't have anything to give you.
This is
[chuckles] You got jokes.
Look, I don't want your money.
Come on, follow me.
I got something to show you.
Get your shoes.
[Cynthia] You're hungry, come on.
Get some over here.
You know that [laughs]
Y'all act like y'all haven't eaten in weeks.
Y'all act like I don't feed you.
Why y'all acting like I don't feed you?
Here you go. [Robert and Trevor talking]
Y'all are greedy, just greedy.
Hey, baby.
You out here getting these eggs
from your chickens?
[Cynthia laughs]
You know I'm gonna get my eggs
and I'm not sharing
since you think it's so funny.
Aww, whatever.
Look, this is Trevor.
Trevor, this is my wife, Cynthia.
Oh, pleased to meet you, Trev.
Hey.
I'm gonna show him, uh,
the guest house.
Oh, okay.
And afterwards we're going to have some lunch
and get to know each other a little better.
Cynthia is a biologist.
She's doing some amazing
research on aerobic bateria
as it accelerates growth in urban flora.
Mm, something like that.
I got it right this time.
Right, yeah, alright. [laughs]
It all kind of sounds like greek to me but
Yeah, me too.
But she makes a lot of money, so, come on.
See you in a minute, baby.
See you inside.
[talking to chickens]
Alright.
So, this is our guest house.
[chuckles] or at least it will be.
And this is where you'll be staying while you're here.
You don't have to do all this, Doc.
You could've just thrown out a bale of hay
and that would've been good.
Well, this is also where you'll be working
while you're here.
Working?
Mm-hmm.
There's got to be some miscommunication.
I don't actually know construction.
I mean, I know it in theory but not in practice.
Well, It's really pretty simple.
I mean, electrical and plumbing
has already been done, yeah?
So, all you have to do is tack up some insulation,
then drywall, spackle and paint.
I mean, it's really pretty simp.
I'm sure you can find somethingon YouTube to help you out.
I get it.
You get my free labor
and you get mine, yeah?
So, now the timing of your sessions
is going to be a little varied
because I'm fitting you in between patients.
But you can call up one of those app car things
and, um, it'll bring you right to the office.
Your office?
Mm-hm.
Oh, I thought we were doing this thing here.
Well, I would rather keep the two aspects
of our relationship separate.
When you're in my home, you're my guest
and when you're in my office
you're my patient, cool?
Yeah, totally.
Uh, that way you can take
responsibility for your own schedule.
And understand, you're here
but you can come to the house anytime you want to.
Sure, yeah, I respect that.
That's cool.
Okay, cool, alright.
Oh, hey, Doc or Robert.
[Robert chuckles]
Can I ask you something?
Sure!
All of this is
is because of what I did?
I'm not, I'm not following you.
Well, you know
I mean, I hurt someone.
Is this, like, to keep me
separate from your family
so you guys are safe?
No, not at all.
Come on.
This is a matter of convenience, yeah?
-Yeah. -Yeah.
So, get yourself settled in
and then come up to the house and have some lunch, uh?
Okay.
We're glad you're here, yeah?
Alright, see you in a minute.
So, pawns can't go forward to capture
but they can go diagonal to capture
That's cool.
And...
rooks can go all the way forward.
Hey, buddy.
Hey.
You're playing by yourself?
Mm-hmm, yeah.
You mind if I join you?
Ok, but I'm not so good.
Oh, that's okay. I'm not good either.
Teach me what you know.
Um, this piece, I was thinking about how
it can go all the way forward
but I can't go diagonal.
See, my brother gets me like that every time.
You have a brother?
Yeah.
Is he like, like, little like me?
Um, no. He's an adult now.
He's a grown up.
But between you and me,
he's kind of a pain in the butt.
I wish I had a little brother.
And you said "butt".
Yeah.
It's, um
I wish I had a little brother.
Yeah, uh, show me something else.
Well, these two are the queen and king
and they're love birds.
They
the queen is the most powerful piece in the game
'‘cause it can both, like the rook,
forward, backwards,
and sideways, and more and diagonal
just like this piece right here
which is named the bishop.
And the king is the most
important piece in the game
Alright, sleepy head.
It's time to go to sleep, okay?
Okay.
Good night, sweetie.
Sweet dreams.
Ah, you can't forget these.
Do you remember why?
So the monsters cannot get into my dreams.
That's right.
You wear these so the monsters
can't come through your ears
and give you nightmares.
Good night.
Ooh, I see you there showing off.
Uh-huh, you know how we do, baby.
Uh-huh, you showing off for me?
[Trevor] Hello?
Well, good morning.
How'd you sleep?
Uh, it was ok.
Smells really good in here.
That would be my world famous crepes.
[Cynthia chuckles]
Usually when someone says world-famous
it... doesn't taste that good.
[Cynthia laughs]
Well, it's like those singers on American Idol
who swear by their voices but they sound like trash.
[Cynthia] Oooh! Well, you know,
Robert spent a year in France after college.
I guess you make quite an impression
even after all these years.
Oh, that's right, baby.
That's how you can [inaudible], yeah.
I was looking into some renovation stuff, um
and I think you may need some more parts.
So, I was going to go to the hardware store after...
Oh, taking some initiative, I like that.
I tell you what, after we finish breakfast
we can jump in the SUV and head on over, huh?
Well, I mean, I was thinking I could go alone.
I can take it.
Are you sure?
Yeah.
Drive my car?
Robert, really?
[chuckles] Got you.
I swear.
Yeah, that's okay.
You can take the car.
Cool.
After I try your world famous crepe.
Oh, you sure you want to try them?
You've been talking about them.
Thank you. Hopefully it's good.
-That's your thank you. -You said hopefully?
Don't mess up, don't mess up.
Okay.
You know, leave him alone.
Leave him alone.
[♪ ]
Hey, Hazel, I know that I'm late
but can I just go right back?
Yeah, go ahead in.
He's waiting.
Hey, so sorry I'm late.
[chuckles] Trevor, so what happened?
Oh, it was a rough morning [chuckles].
What, your alarm clock didn't go off
in time or something?
No, it was more like I was, uh,
having some trouble getting motivated.
We've all been there, you know.
[chuckles] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We've all been there.
Um, well, we don't have much time left.
I got another session in a few minutes, so
Oh, yeah, I'm sorry.
I mean, we can do it another time.
No worries, no worries.
Look, I can see you're really trying, huh?
Um, but even with the little bit
of time we have left,
I think there's something we need to discuss, yes?
I'm going to put my serious doctor face on for a minute.
Okay, so, this is, what, our 4th session?
Well, it would've been our 4th if I was on time.
[laughs] Right.
Um, well, I'm going to talk to you
about something we've been kind of
dancing around for a minute.
Given my assessment of you and your history,
I'm diagnosing you with bipolar disorder.
I just want to let you know,
so, you can take the worry off your mind
I know it's beenstressing you out a little bit.
So, you're saying that because I lose my temper,
and I have random passionate moments
that I'm crazy?
Trevor, Come on, come on, now.
-No, but -W-w-wait, wait.
We've been over this, huh?
It's nothing to do with being crazy.
There's a lot of things that could factor into this.
Most likely, it's just
some kind of chemical imbalance.
And everybody has some kind of imbalance, so
-But -Wait, wait,
so, to use your words,
use your words,
everybody's got a little crazy in them.
Doc, I...
Look, Trevor, Trevor, Trevor,
look at me.
Look at me, it's just science, man.
It doesn't make you a bad perso-
[Trevor stammers]
Doesn't make you a bad person.
Okay, uh... okay.
Okay... mm. Mm-mm.
Don't tell on me, okay?
What?
I'm not supposed to be smoking.
Can mess up my meds.
What are you doing?
Just waiting for my ride.
Well, you must've gotten some bad news.
You were in there for, like, two minutes.
[exhales]
I don't want to talk about it.
Fine.
So, what kind of meds they put you on?
I-I'm here for counseling.
I'm not
no one's putting me on meds.
Nah-uh. If that was true
you'd just see a regular shrink.
If you're seeing Weldon, they're putting you on meds.
He'll keep telling you that you're not crazy.
That it's just science.
But if that was true,
let me ask you something,
why do they still call those drugs
antipsychotics?
Sam, what have we told you?
Sam, you should not be smoking.
Busted.
Hurry in, the doctor's waiting.
See you later.
[knocking] Come in.
It's your barn.
Ah, looking pretty good, man.
So, dinner's almost ready.
Actually, I'm not hungry but thank you.
Yeah, well, that's understandable.
Uh, look, I brought you something.
You ran out so quick today,
I didn't get a chance
to give them to you before you left.
They're pills.
Mm-hmm.
These antipsychotics?
Ah, we don't call them that anymore.
It's more like, uh,
like a mood stabilizer.
Look, Trevor, I know this is
a lot to take in.
But if we're going to be honest,
you don't really handle your episodes very well.
What do they do?
Even things out a bit. That's it.
And if you find yourself too much
on one side or the other,
then we-- let me know
and we can adjust your medication.
Yeah, I'd rather not
if there's different options
or something else we could do
other than this.
I'm afraid that this is
a non-negotiable.
Look, I know you don't like
talking about it
but you had that incident
with your brother, yeah?
And you're here all day
with my wife and my child, so
I'm going to need you to take the medicine.
And I'm going to need you to stay the course.
And if you refuse then
you have to go home.
Trevor...
Trevor, did you hear what I said?
Yeah.
Okay.
Your condition is manageable
but you have to manage it, yeah?
Yeah.
Okay.
And, um you should just
come down to dinner anyway.
You don't have to eat, but
I think it'd be good for you to be around people.
Yeah.
Okay. See you in a minute.
[sighs]
[speaking softly] Okay, okay.
You believe in the process,
you want it to work.
You believe in the process.
You want it to work. You want it to work.
You believe in the process,
you want to work.
You believe in the process,
you want it to work
You believe in the process,
you want it to work.
You want this, you want this.
You believe in the process,
you want it work.
Okay, you believe in the process,
you want it to work.
Alright.
It's time to go to sleep, okay?
Mmm, okay.
Good night sweetie.
Sweet dreams.
Ah, we can't forget these.
Do you remember why?
So monsters cannot get into my dreams.
That's right.
You wear these so the monsters
can't come through your ears
and give you nightmares.
Good night.
[distant arguing]
[♪ ]
[arguing continues]
[arguing stops]
[♪ ]
[cell phone vibrating]
Hey, Mom.
Hey, baby.
I just wanted to give you
a quick call before I head to work.
How you doing?
Good, I'm good.
You don't sound so good.
Everything's fine. I'm good.
So, how's it going with Dr. Weldon?
It's good.
All good.
Are you going to say "good"
every time I ask you a question?
Mmh?
You do realize I talk to him, too.
I mean, if you know, why are you asking?
Listen, there's no reason to be snippy.
Just want to hear from you.
I want to know how you're doing.
You realize there's nothing
to be ashamed of, right?
Yeah, I know.
So, are you taking the meds
that he gave you?
Yeah.
Are they helping?
Trevor, listen to me.
I believe in you.
And I know that you
can handle this, alright?
You're young, you're capable,
you're smart.
You can do it.
What if that's not enough, Mom?
I got to--
I got to go to work, okay?
But you keep doing what you doing.
Love you.
I'll give you a call tomorrow.
I love you.
Trevor.
Trevor!
Hmm?
What?
Where did you go just now?
Sorry, I guess I spaced.
Mm-hmm.
Well, I was asking you
if there was something on your mind?
That's our time, isn't it?
Well, yeah, but if there was
something else you want to talk about
we can go over a few minutes.
I mean, it looks like
there's something on your mind.
No. No. We're good.
Guess I'll just see you back at the house?
Okay.
Jeez, man! You scared me.
I thought you were Hazel.
Sam, right?
Yep.
And you're Trevor?
Yeah.
How'd you
Hazel told me.
Said that I shouldn't talk to you.
[whispers] I'm a bad influence.
[Trevor chuckles]
My car will be here in a minute.
Hey, you were right, by the way.
He did put me on the meds.
How's that going for you?
Can I ask you something?
Shoot.
How long am I going to feel like this?
Depends on what you mean.
For me, the dizziness
went away pretty quick.
Headaches come and go.
Diarrhea though
No, I mean
This fuzzy feeling in my head
like everything's turned down.
How long is that?
Like you're never really fully awake?
Yeah.
Doesn't really go away.
You just kind of get used to it.
No, it's not
They can't expect us to live like this.
What's your diagnosis?
Bipolar.
Well, some people get over it eventually.
Really?
Yeah,
like in 30 or 40 years.
30 or 40 years, it's
Bullshit?
Yeah! It is, I mean...
I mean, how am I supposed
to be creative if I feel like this?
I
I used to like who I was and
Now, I don't even know who I
am anymore.
Preach it!
It's stupid!
[Sam laughs]
Now, Trevor, tell me,
How does it make you feel?
Felt good.
It's the first time
I've ever felt anything since I started
taking these stupid pills, you know?
A crazy idea.
You want to get out of here,
go do something?
I can ditch out of my session.
I gotta work. Rain check?
Sure.
Yeah, I don't know when
but we can figure something out.
Yeah, we're both here, I mean
Sam, you're late.
Come on, Dr. Weldon's waiting.
Yes, Ms. Hazel.
Next time.
See ya.
[knocking]
Trevor, can I come in?
Trevor,
you didn't come down to breakfast.
Look, Trevor, you know
you can talk to me, right?
Anything that's on your mind
you can really--
Just go away, please.
[barn door opens]
I know what you're going through.
I also know you don't want
to talk and that's okay.
You don't have to.
But I'm going to talk
for a while if that's okay.
Right now, you're feeling worthless.
You feel tired, you feel guilty.
You don't have an appetite.
You just want to sleep.
But you can't because your brain
won't let any of it shut off.
I don't know if this is your first
or your worst but...
What you're going through
is a depressive episode.
Sometimes, it's minor,
little more than sadness
or despair on a normal day.
Or sometimes, it's like this.
[sighs]
Nine years ago, I was diagnosed
with major depressive disorder.
I was exactly like you
for weeks.
Eventually, I tried to do
something about it.
I was sent to Robert.
And...
[sighs]
That's how I found out there was help.
Trevor, I need you to listen to me.
You have two choices.
You can either lay here and wallow in it
and let it consume you,
Or you could do something about it
and you can do something about it.
It takes time to come to terms with it.
But in the meantime,
Robert wants to adjust your medication.
You're still adjusting to it, so,
it's gonna take some trial and error
to get the right balance.
Does it ever get easier?
Living like this?
I'm not going to lie to you.
It never gets easy.
But it does get manageable.
Once you get control of it
and it no longer has control of you,
you'll realize just how much
you're capable of.
Hey, Mom, you gotta take this out.
You-you have to take it out.
Are you sure you want me to open this?
Yep, you yep.
You don't want to open it?
Yeah, come on. Let's just...
Okay.
Ooh, it's a lot of papers
[chuckles]
Is it bad?
What is it?
Trev, you got a 3.9.
I did? I did?
Seriously?
[giggles] Come here.
This is...
Come here.
Okay.
You are a genius.
Where are you going?
You are a genius like your mom.
I'm going to put this on the fridge.
No, Mom, don't do that.
Don't be that kind of mom.
I want everybody to see it
when they come here.
No, don't, Mom, don't be
that kind of mom.
I'm not listening to you, no.
[arguing]
Mom, can we please just go back?
Mom, it's just back there!
Close the damn door!
Mom...
It's...
just back there, I'm
I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that.
I shouldn't have done that.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, Mom. I shouldn't...
[Trevor and Gavin talking]
Wait, where are you again?
Where are you?
Come on, man.
Nah! No, no, no, no, no,
get outta here!
Sit down, sit down, sit down.
[arguing]
you didn't actually win because of lack of skill.
There is a glitch in the game.
Let's run it back. Let's do it again.
I don't need to trade controllers
with you, man.
Let's play, you just need to
let's do this again '‘cause cheated.
Something happened.
You didn't win because you're good.
You win because I let you, alright?
You can shut up, that's what you can do.
Let's just play this game again.
Let's go back...
Trev, It's just a drawing.
It's not just a drawing, Gav!
It's not just drawing!
It's not just a drawing, Gav!
It's not just a drawing!
It's more...
Gav, I'm...
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry
Oh, my God. I'm sorry,
I'm so sorry.
I
Gav...
Gavin, I'm sorry.
Come on Trevor! Pick up the pace.
You're too slow!
We got about a mile to go.
[cell phone vibrating]
Hey, Trev.
Gavin?
Hey, what's up?
Mom is in the shower.
Um
How's it going?
Good. Things are, um
okay.
I'm doing better.
Listen, Gav, um
I wanted to say that I'm really--
It's okay, Trev, whatever it is
you feel like you have to say,
maybe it can wait
until you come home.
You know, it just feels
kind of weird doing it
over the phone, you know?
Yeah, yeah.
Hey, a couple of days ago
I was thinking about that
World Rally 3 game we played
and how you beat me for the first time ever.
Yeah, it was a good day.
Yeah.
Maybe we can
play again sometime, rematch?
Sure.
Sure. I'm gonna have, um,
Mom call you back
when she gets out, alright?
Yeah, okay.
[sighs]
Trevor!
I am sorry, I was in the shower.
How you doing?
Hey, Mom.
Uh, I'm good, just a little tired.
Went on a jog with Robert.
Oh, so, it's Robert now?
Okay.
Yeah, well, he prefers Dr. Weldon
when we are in session.
Well, it sounds like
you guys are getting along well.
Yeah.
Hey, I had a question.
How did you guys meet again?
Honey, I told you.
He's an old friend of the famil.
Yeah, but...
Yeah, but Ma, how do you know him?
Like, where did you meet?
I mean, where did the interaction
where-- I don't understand.
You know, I'm not sure
I actually remember how we met.
Um
Probably at a party or something.
Why do you ask?
I'm just curious.
Is he a friend of Dad's?
You know, uh,
now that you mention it,
uh, yeah.
I think he was a friend of your dad's, yeah.
I think they went to college together.
Honey, that was so long ago.
Okay.
But I'm sure Robert doesn't remember.
Hey, look, I got to go shower.
So, um
I'll talk to you later.
Alright, love you.
So
I'm really glad you're feeling better, Trevor.
I am, thanks.
So
do you think you feel like
talking about the incident with your brother?
No. No-no-no-no-no.
So, why do you think
you're avoiding that, Trevor?
I'm-I'm not avoiding it, okay?
I think about it constantly.
When it happened
I was barely aware of what was going on.
I have this vivid dream,
a memory in my mind.
It was like I was somebody else.
So I
I don't want to talk about it.
Please.
Fine.
So
What do you want to talk about?
Oh, I hear the Braves won 4 in a row,
you know that? [Trevor scoffs]
[Robert laughs] I'm not,
I'm not much of a baseball guy.
Okay.
Um
Actually, I do have a question there for you.
My mom says you were
an old friend of the family
but she can't remember how you met.
Do you remember how you met?
[chuckes] Um
No, I can't seem to recall either.
So, you can remember how to make crepes
from scratch from college but you can't remember
how you met my parents? Really?
Look, now you're going to make me look for it.
Okay. Let's see.
Oh!
Yeah, I-I think I met your mother
at a clinical trial for a new drug.
She was there for the hospital
and, uh,
we chatted and hit it off and became friends.
And then she just introduced you
to my dad, right?
Uh, yes, I believe so.
You want to talk about your father, Trev?
Is that why you're asking me all of this?
No, there's not much to talk about.
I'm good.
Are you sure?
I mean, just say what's on your mind,
whatever you're thinking.
Uh, okay, sure.
He died when I was five.
There's nothing really much to remember.
I mean, he was funny, he was kind.
There was something else,
drugs, I think.
Why do you say that?
My mom never talks about him with us.
She just wants us to remember him
the way that we want to.
But I know that he was shot.
But you already knew that, right?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, cool. Well, listen, uh
I got, like, 10 minutes left
so I'm just gonna,
I'm going to head out.
Uh, I was pretty tired from that jog, so
I'll just, uh, I'll see you next session.
Okay, okay fine, Trevor.
I'll see you back at the house.
You alright?
No, I'm pissed, or
at least I think I am.
I can't tell with these stupid meds
messing with my head.
You wanna get out of here?
You wanna go ditch and just--
Hell, yeah! Come on,
I wanna show you something.
Okay, let's go. Let's get out of here.
Weldon
-What? -God, I can't...
He's not telling the truth about something.
He's lying to me
and I just don't understand--
Alright, alright. It's fine just
trust me.
Where are we going?
Yonder.
Alright, this should be good
because I'm not much of a
nature-adventure guy.
Ah, you'll be fine.
Promise not to kill you on your first try.
Oh, thanks, that makes me feel
very safe.
Alright, this way!
Just so you know, I'm not attracted to you.
-What? -I didn't bring you here
to, like, make out or fool around.
Yeah, I know that that's not
what this is about.
Good.
Alright, out with it.
What's got your panties in a wad?
I just feel like I'm being lied to.
Aren't we all?
Are you a schizo?
What?
Well, if you're schizophrenic,
you might only think you're being lied to.
No, no, I'm not a schizo.
Do you hear voices in your head?
I'm not a schizo. I don't hear voices.
Are you just one of those people
that have no filter,
says whatever comes to mind?
Yeah, but that's not why see Weldon.
Then, why?
I have something called
intermittent explosive disorder.
Basically, it means I fly off the handle
for no reason.
A couple of months ago,
a coworker of mine told me
that I was talking too loud
and so I hit her with a chair.
Not one of those, folding chairs,
like, in wrestling
but like a big chair with wheels!
Seriously?
Yeah.
She pressed charges for assault
and I could've gotten jail time.
But instead, I got probation
and Weldon
and a fistful of pills.
Do they help?
I haven't had an episode in a while
if that's what you mean.
I just want to understand how they expect us
to live like this.
I mean, every time I take those stupid pills,
I feel less, less like myself and
They keep saying that it's just an illness,
it's not a part of me, it's not who I am.
But
it's in my head, isn't it?
Which means it's a part of me.
They want us numb.
'‘Cause if we can feel, then it might come out.
You know I was in school to be an architect?
I didn't.
That's cool.
Yeah, it is pretty cool.
I used to draw these blueprints
of houses when I was a kid.
It was awesome.
I would do, like, slides for stairs
and
Uh, is that safe or...?
I like the sound.
It calms me.
[♪ ]
Whoa whoa, whoa, what are you doing?
Come on, climb over!
What? That's not safe.
Come on!
You want to remember
what it feels like to be alive?
Oh, God!
This feels amazing!
[Sam and Trevor scream]
Alright, alright. Let's go back,
let's go back.
Is that what we're gonna have to do?
Do stupid stuff like that
in order to feel alive?
Beats not feeling anything.
That's true.
[Sam laughs]
We should head back.
Alright, come on, I'll drive you.
No, that's okay, I'll walk.
Alright.
[exhales]
Oh I--I'm sorry.
I was looking for Robert.
It's okay, Trevor.
What's up?
Well, I just wanted to run
something by him, really.
I think he said he'd be about an hour.
Okay, well, I can just wait.
No, come on.
Come on.
Okay, cross you legs.
No, it's no use Cynthia.
You don't have to do everything perfectly.
This is your daily routine?
Uh...
[inaudible]
Okay, okay.
You know what?
It's okay.
Let's try something else.
Cross you legs the best you can.
You're trying to kill me.
That's what's happening.
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
Let's sit and let's breath in and out.
Okay.
In...
and out.
I don't understand what we're doing with this.
You're also supposed to be silent.
Silence is powerful.
It's just sometimes it's best to just sit
and be silent.
What does the silence do for you,
if you don't mind me asking?
Sometimes, I pray.
I reflect.
I redirect my thoughts
if I'm [inaudible]
I just get to know how my mind works
so that I can...
so that I can release tension.
You do this every day?
No.
Sometimes I cry.
Sometimes I get mad.
Most times I just seek clarity from God.
But nothing exists outside this room.
This, right here, is my outlet.
The last couple of years, I just...
I've been taking the holistic approach to my treatment.
I'm not much of a holistic kind of guy.
It's too trendy for me. No offense.
I feel that.
Everything is not for everybody.
But you gotta find something,
some outlet.
So, burning incense and meditation
is kind of your thing?
It's not about that.
It's about finding balance.
It's about learning how your mind works.
It's like a monitor,
a diet,
an exercise.
I've learned how to mold my environment.
So, there's other ways outside of the pills then?
Trevor, it's very important that you...
that you try to stick to the path
that Robert has you on.
You're gonna learn yourself eventually.
You're going to look into alternatives.
But for now, just...
for now, just stay the course.
Trust the process.
Of course, I will. Yeah.
Thanks.
I'm still lucky to be alive.
I'm gonna head out.
This was kind of tough but good.
Thanks, Cynthia.
Thank you.
[exhales]
[♪ ]
So, baby, can we get that, uh,
that lobster thing you do for dinner?
You know, you always ask for the lobster thing.
Well, you know.
Why can't we get it, though, is the question.
[Cynthia laughs]
I mean, I may be able to work something out.
Okay, well, that's what's up.
Rise and grind folks!
Good morning, good morning.
How's everyone doing?
Good to see you.
Looks like somebody slept well.
No, I did not sleep at all
but I am feeling great.
You guys want me to make you breakfast?
I mean, I can only make omelettes
but they're really, really
good omelettes, I mean, amazing!
Well, that's thoughtful.
Um, let's see what we've got in here.
Yeah.
Let me see here.
Okay, got mushrooms.
Yeah, mushrooms are great.
Yes. Peppers.
Peppers are good, peppers are good.
What else we got?
We'll need eggs.
Yeah, we're definitely going to need some eggs.
So, Trevor,
how are you doing this morning?
You feeling alright?
Yeah, I'm feeling great.
Feeling really, really great.
Yeah, well, Cynthia said there was something
you wanted to talk to me about.
Oh, yeah! Well, nah, it's not important.
You want onions?
Yes?
Sure.
Look at that, we got onions, right here.
So, we gotta figure out...
I need to know where the cutting board is
but don't tell me.
I gotta get acclimated with the kitchen.
No. Nope, nope. Okay, nope.
It's alright. Imma find it, Imma find it.
We're gonna make some breakfast.
No-no-no-no-no.
No help necessary.
I'm gonna find this cutting board.
Hey, what's up, man?
What are you doing?
Trying to see how to grip a football.
Here, let me see.
I'm good at this.
You just gotta hold it pretty tight.
Just like that. Hold it down.
Oh, you good?
Yeah, I'm just trying to get in
on this football lesson.
Just making sure you had it in you still.
Hey, you want to go?
Let's go on the swings.
Let's see how high we can get.
As high as we can.
Yeah!
Gotta get in the swing there, kid.
So, go by yourself first and put let's see.
Now, come on.
We gotta get a big swing in there.
You got to swing big, big!
You gotta think big there, Alton.
I know!
Trevor!
Trevor, we need to talk.
Alright, Doc, you talk, I'm pushing.
No, you need to stop
and Alton needs to go in the house.
Aww! Come on,
just another couple of minutes
Trevor, stop now!
Oh, coach, don't be such a buzz kill, Doc!
That's too high!
[Trevor scoffs]
Buddy, go on in the house.
Hey, what, look, I'm sorry.
Was it too hard of a push?
You stopped taking your meds.
No, I didn't.
I count them.
Oh, mutual trust, huh?
Come on.
You're going to stand here and lie to my face
and talk about mutual trust?
You had one rule here, one rule
and that was to follow your course of treatment.
Yeah, well, I'm exploring
different alternatives, Doc.
Come on, now.
Come on, it's good,
I feel great.
Cynthia has spent years managing her illness.
She did the work,
and she found a treatment that works for her.
You have not! Tre--
You are experiencing a manic episode right now.
I'm not--
What does Cynthia have to do
with any of this?
I'm great, I feel good.
I'm not having an episode.
I feel amazing actually.
That's what mania is, that's what it does.
It's a high!
Oh, Doc.
Most times you don't even realize you have it.
Look, I know how I feel better than you do.
I'm good.
Do you?
Yeah.
When's the last time you slept?
Hmm, hmm?
You did a week's worth of work
in one night!
Look, Trevor, when you are like this,
things can happen,
things that you don't mean to happen.
Like what happened with your brother.
No-no-no-no, that was different.
That was different, that was different!
Trevor, calm down.
[Trevor stammering]
You think you know everything?
You don't know anything.
I would know.
This is my brain, okay?
This is my body, this is...
Trevor!
...me, this is not... -Trevor!
You broke my trust
and I cannot have you around my family
when you are like this.
What do you even
what are you doing?
You don't know what you're talking about.
You don't know anything here.
This is my brain, this is my body.
I'm fine. This is my mind.
This is my body!
You don't, get to,
tell me, what to, do!
You have broken my trust.
And I cannot have you around my family like this.
So, if you are not going to follow my instructions,
you have to leave my house.
So, you want me to leave?
You just want me to go,
you don't want me here?
You think I'm dangerous or something?
Like my mom, my brother, it's not
Trevor, this is not about what I think,
it's about what I know.
No, fine, fine, fine! I'll go! I'll go!
That's what you want?
You want me to leave?
No, I'm gone. I'm gone, Doc.
I'm gone!
Hey, you.
Baby, he's gone.
Gone?
Yeah, Trevor's gone.
Gone where?
[stammering] I don't know.
Like, he blew up, I blew up
and then he left.
Aww.
This is my second time failing this family.
I don't know how to help somebody
who does not want to be helped.
Hey, you can't think like that.
It's not that he doesn't want help.
Listen, baby.
This is all brand-new to him.
He don't even understand.
Now, hasn't he made all your appointments?
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Now, he should be damn near done with that barn.
Oh, he finished that last night.
Okay, so he's trying.
Oh, no, he on that manic side right now.
Listen, you and I both know
that it's still up to him to do the work.
Not you.
Got me?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Well, I guess if he's serious, he'll come back, huh?
You guess?
Yeah, I guess.
Mm.
Give me some sugar
Ooh, I'm gonna get me another one.
Ah, you like this?
I do.
You make things better don't you?
Come on, what you doing over here?
Coloring my favorite things in,you know.
[cell phone vibrates]
Hey, Mom.
No, it's me.
Gavin?
Yeah, I didn't think you'd answer
for anyone but Mom.
Dude, where are you?
Uh
I'm not sure. I left and I don't,
I don't know.
Okay, well, listen, um
Dr. Weldon just called Mom to tell her what happened
but she left her phone at home, so he told me.
Trev, don't
Don't be an idiot.
An idiot?
Gavin, you have no idea what you're talking about.
You have no idea what this is like, Bro.
Would you just shut up and listen to me
for one second?
When Dad died,
I was too young to remember him, alright?
I got little memories,
barely fragments,
and to be honest I don't even know
if they're real or not.
Okay? The point is
I didn't have him around to look up to.
I had you.
When I was a kid,
I would look at you and it was, like,
I mean, you could do anything.
Remember that, uh, stupid racing game
that you brought up the other day,
the time that I beat you?
I was thinking about that, too, because
that was honestly one of the first times
that I felt myself becoming more like you.
This is all I ever really wanted.
To be more like Trev.
But not now.
Not anymore.
You're letting this thing beat you.
You're giving up.
It's not that easy, Gavin.
It's not some game or an exam
that I can just beat or pass.
This is something I have to manage
for the rest of my life.
The rest of my life!
So, what?
Are you saying that you're not strong enough?
You're just going to let this thing beat you?
No, I'm trying to be strong,
I'm trying to be strong for you,
I'm trying to be strong for Mom,
I'm trying.
That's the thing, it's not for Mom
or for me or for anybody else.
You gotta do this for you.
I'm tr--
I'm trying. I'm trying.
Damn it. You, uh,
you really wanted to be like me?
Still do.
I wanna be like
the old you.
The real you.
You're not going to tell Mom
on me, are you?
That depends...
What are you gonna do now?
First, uh
I got to figure out where the hell I am.
[cell phone vibrating]
Hey, Robbie, it's Rachel.
Hey, Rachel.
Yeah, Gavin told me you called.
I am sorry.
Yeah, I'm sorry that I put you
in this position.
Nah, nah, nah, don't worry about it.
It's not your fault.
You know, he was
he was doing well, Rachel.
He really was.
Well, maybe I should come and see him.
Do you think that would help?
[chuckles] I don't know where he is.
Well, he hasn't called me yet,
so I don't think he's coming home.
[chuckles] who knows,
he might be trying to call your bluff.
Yeah, well, he did that, alright.
[chuckles]
But, um, yeah, yeah,
I think it'd be good for you
to come and visit.
Alright, well, work is a little hectic now
but within the next few days
I'll make my way down there.
Alright, well, hit me up when you're on the way
and it'll be good to see you, huh?
Mm-hmm, alright.
Alright, bye-bye.
So, are you ready?
Yeah, um
I just wanted to say that I was sorry
for betraying your trust.
Trevor, Trevor, look, it's,
it's not me you gotta worry about.
You betrayed yourself, hmm?
So, I'll ask you again,
Are you ready?
Because I can't get my time back
and neither can you.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Heard you quit.
Well, whatever happened
to doctor-patient confidentiality?
I don't think that applies
if you're not a patient anymore.
Fair.
My brother guilt me back into it.
Yeah? Good.
'‘Cause for all the trash that I talk
about pills and hypocrisy,
it's better than the alternative.
And the therapy part, the talking,
it really does help.
Hope I'll see you later.
Yeah, see you, Sam.
[Rachel and Trevor speaking in dream]
[Rachel] Alright, sleepy head.
It's time to go to sleep, okay?
[distant arguing]
[arguing becomes louder]
Huh?
Trevor.
You seem a little distant today.
Oh
Sorry, I
I just have a lot on my mind,
I guess.
Well, um, that kind of is the point
of these sessions, yeah?
Yeah, that's true.
Um, I, uh,
I keep having this recurring dream
of me as a kid and every time I have it
it goes a little further but it...
But what?
It's...
It's like my brain is trying to keep me out.
It's weird, I
It's like I can't go any further with it,
I don't know.
That is interesting. Um...
Hmm.
Well, sometimes repressed memories
can manifest themselves as dreams.
They're in our subconscious all the time
even if we have them locked away.
Hmm.
You know, I tell you what,
tell me about it.
Maybe we can bring it out, huh?
Yeah, yeah, okay.
Um...
I think I was about 4 or 5 maybe
and, um,
My mom, she used to let me
listen to music while I sleep.
But as I got older I realized
it was because she...
didn't want me to hear her and my dad fighting.
Did they fight often?
I mean, I was little. I was
I don't really remember.
I mean, there were a few instances
where I heard the shouting and the screaming and stuff.
But this time
the sound was different.
Different?
Different how?
Yeah, in... in the dream
they were fighting,
they were shouting and then I woke up
'‘cause I couldn't, I couldn't sleep
and I got out of bed,
then I walked down the hall.
And then my mind won't let me go any further.
It's like my mind's keeping something from me.
But I do remember what I heard.
I
I remember what I heard.
Trevor
What'd you hear?
A gunshot.
And, Doc, I
I think that I might've seen my dad get killed
and I think it happened in our house and...
I think that I've been just having this
repressed memory stuff for years trying...
And now it's, it's...
I mean, this is gotta be, like,
breakthrough, right?
This has got to mean something.
It has to mean something because
now it's starting to come together, isn't it?
[clears throat] Has, um...
[hesitates]
Has your mother, uh, ever
talked to you about your father's death?
No, she she just wants us to remember him
the way that we want to, the way that I want to.
But
I don't--
I mean this has to be breakthrough, right?
Like, this has to mean something,
it has to mean something
because now all these pieces are kinda
coming together, right?
Right?
Trevor, um
Look, sometimes a dream is just a dream.
I mean, you could be having
what we call a lucid dream, yeah?
And, which seems very real at t-
No, wait. But you--
no, you just said
I could've had a repressed memory and--
but what if I did see my dad get killed?
And what if that's
why I am the way that I am and--
Hey, hey, hey Trevor, Trevor, Trevor.
Trevor, look, I
I understand your concerns but
we can't jump to conclusions, huh?
Not until we have some more information
and when you just...
And, um
our time is up for the day but--
W-w-wait, wait, wait,
I tell you what.
Let's do this.
If you have this dream again,
you talk to me about it, huh?
And then we'll figure out our plan of action
if and when we get some more information.
[sighs] Yeah.
Yeah?
Yeah, okay. Okay, okay.
Yep, we will.
-Okay. -Okay.
Um, okay, thanks.
I'll see you for dinner, yeah?
-Yeah. -Yeah.
[Cynthia chuckles] And so, what 's crazy
is that on our honeymoon, I swear to you,
this dude got sunburn so bad,
he looked like a hot chili pepper [inaudible]
He did?
Yes! Can you believe that?
I see that my wife is reveling
in her favorite pastime,
that's laughing at my expense here.
Thank you, honey.
I would've brought you one, Trevor
but, um, I don't think it's a good idea
to mix alcohol while you're still
getting adjusted to your meds.
No, that's okay.
I'm not much of a wine drinker,
so, it's fine.
[chuckles] Okay.
So, uh, I'm glad you came back.
I wanted to make you get sentimental.
[Robert laughs]
Well, you know, after our time
is done here, I don't see any reason
why we still couldn't see each other
from time to time, you know?
And maybe even in time we could get you
to come and babysit Alton
while Cyn and I take a vacation.
[Cynthia laughs] Did you just call me Cyn?
since we first started dating.
Somebody's had a little too much wine.
My mom calls me Trev and my brother,
so, I get it.
Wait, wait, wait,
what was the name your friends used to call you
when we first started dating.
[Robert groans] Was it, um, Bobby?
No, no, it was Robbie.
Robbie! It was awful.
Yeah, I would question my friendships, too
if I had a nickname like that.
Well, thank God nobody calls me that anymore, huh?
[Cynthia] Yeah, thank God.
[Cynthia] Hey.
Trevor.
-Yeah. -You okay?
Yeah, uh...
I just got tired, so, I'm gonna
I'm gonna go to bed.
So, you guys have a good night.
[Cynthia] Okay. [Robert]Alright, okay.
[Trevor] Goodnight.
[Cynthia] Goodnight.
He'll be aight.
He'll be "aight"”. [chuckles]
Let's go upstairs.
Well, come on, grab you glass.
Yeah.
I'm leaving you!
No, you're not!
I'm leaving you!
No, you're not.
And I'm taking my kids and I'm leaving.
I'm leaving!
-I'm done. -Mm-mm.
-I'm done. -Mm-mm
I'm leaving.
[chuckles] Yeah, right.
I'm so sick of you.
You're so weak!
I'm weak?
Who you callin' weak?!
Who are you calling weak?!
Nobody, get off me.
You belong to me! You belong to me!
What are you gonna do?
Get off of me!
A knife?
Ha-ha-ha! A knife!
What are you gonna do with that?
You don't know anything about using a knife.
How about I show you how to use a knife?!
Get off of me!
Put that down!
You think you can threaten me with a knife?
You play around with a knife?
Do you know what a knife is?
Hold on.
Who did you call, Rachel?
Who the hell did you !
Hey, hey, T, T! Yo, yo!
Weldon! Welcome!
Take your shoes off when you come in my house.
What you doin', man?!
T, let her go.
No!
That's your wife, man! Let her go.
Yes, it is my wife.
This is my family.
Those are my boys.
This is my wife.
Get out!
Weldon, step the hell back!
This is my family!
Get out!
Man, please, please.
Brother, brother, le-let her go!
I'm off your meds, man.
Talking ain't gonna work this time.
I got it, I got it, I got it.
Alright, then.
Just let her go, let her go.
Come on, put the knife
Oh, oh!
[choking] Doc, Doc!
I'm sorry, T.
I didn't, I
No, no-no-no-no!
Trevor?
It wasn't a dream.
It was a memory.
You, and you knew that.
You you lied, you
You killed him.
It was a memory and you knew that.
-Wait, wait, Trevor, Trevor, -You lied.
-you don't understand. -You killed him.
No, no! You don't understand!
No, you don't understand!
You did this!
You don't understand!
[Cynthia screaming]
You did this!
[screaming] Ah, stop it!
Get off of me!
Stop, please, stop!
Hello!
[stammering] Yeah, yeah, I-I need
an ambulance and-and police!
4412 Roché.
[screaming] 4412 Roché!
What's happening?
Alton, Alton, go back to your room
and do not come out until I tell you to.
Go now!
[door creaks]
Just come out Trevor.
I know you're in here.
I took you in,
I treated you like family.
What did you do? What did you do?!
You put my son in danger
and you attacked my wife!
Boy, I don't give a damn about your illness.
That's my family!
No!
[sirens wailing]
What you gonna do, huh?
You're gonna shoot me?!
S-s-shut up! Shut up, shut up!
Trevor, put the gun down.
Mom, no.
He he killed Dad, Mom.
He killed Dad.
Baby, no he didn't.
Yes, he did.
Put the gun down.
No, Ma, I have to do this.
It's for us, it's for Gavin,
it's for Dad, it
Honey, listen to me.
Now, the police are here.
Any minute now, they're gonna come
through this door.
Is this what you want them to find?
Bobby, she's ok.
Go take care of her.
No, no, Mom...
Trevor, listen to me.
I didn't want you to know that your,
your father suffered from mental illness.
[whispering] No, he didn't. No, he didn't.
Listen, baby, he had, he was bipolar,
mildly schizophrenic.
Doctor Weldon was his therapistfor a short while.
That's how we met him, that's how we know him.
And I lied to you.
I'm sorry.
No...
-Baby, it's the truth. -It doesn't make sense.
Baby, it's the truth.
Look, your father was good for a while,
then he stopped taking his medication.
And that night when you were little,
honey, that day I was convinced
that he had to kill me.
I didn't want the police to take him,
so I called Robbie.
He killed him. He did it.
Baby, it was an accident.
We tried to reason with him.
He tried to talk him
but there was nothing he could say.
And in the end,
honey, he did what he had to do.
It was an accident?
It was-- it was an accident?
Baby, I'm sorry.
It was an accident.
Listen, I'm sorry.
I...
But the truth is that your daddy gave up.
Honey, he let it consume him.
Are you gonna do the same?
[crying] I
'Cause I'm not the same woman
as I was back then, okay?
I'm not going to let anyone be a victim here.
Not even you.
It was an accident, it was an accident.
It was an accident.
How many times do you hurt
the people you love?
Do you damage everything good in your life
before you start to deal with it?
Dealing with it,
it's not meds,
it's not therapy,
It's acceptance.
It's being proactive.
It's loving yourself so much that you force yourself
to become a better version of yourself every day.
I got this.
We got this.
This is the last time that anything like this
will ever happen again.
[♪ ]